My last blog, concluded, talking of the additional, upheaval, if you can call it that, that had been added to getting myself to the Philippines. But, fast forward a few weeks, we’re now both back, safe and sound in the UK. But, that’s not to say things went… smoothly. In fact, it’s been, in reality, quite the rollercoaster, but, hey, makes for a good blog.

To slightly recap, obviously, my original flight to the Philippines, did get cancelled, cancelled again, and… to the point where it seemed like I was never going to be going. Daily calls with Emirates to rebook, to the point, days in to, now, when I should have already arrived, still flailing to find a way to get to the Philippines. A very meager compromise, in the end, had to be accepted, if I was to ever arrive in the Philippines. I’m not going to lie, yes, the thought of just admitting defeat and not going to the Philippines, did cross my mind. I’d of got a full refund, my Travel Insurance would have covered for the non-refundable Hotel, but, Hannah was having none of that… so, we were going.

I wouldn’t be able to travel directly to Cebu, however, as Emirates were, at this point, still unable to get there and continuing their Asia cancellations… with a few exceptions, in terms of Cebu, meaning, South Korea. So, instead of a traditional journey, my compromise trip would be, slightly, inconvenienced, with a detour through South Korea. So, sure, not perfect, a few more hours to kill, than normal, in Dubai, to then a brief detour in South Korea, not too lengthy more than the Clark one Emirates do on the way back, so… on paper, things didn’t look …too bad. But, things just never seem to work out that way, do they.

The biggest deterrent that was constantly thrown my way, was, not the Philippines, obviously, not the UK journey, but, of course, travelling through, and, to, Dubai. Whilst Dubai isn’t the perpetrator of the ongoing conflict, being in the UAE, they’re right in the centre of it, not just, geographically. And, if you watch the mainstream News media, you’d be thinking I would be crazy, my life is at risk, and I’m probably writing this from my grave. But, well, Dubai never was really the issue, in the end.

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Why were we worried about Dubai?

Might seem like an ironic question to ask considering the conflict surrounding the Iranian regime vs, the US and Isreal, which has already had a fallout that’s impacted, mostly, UAE, including Dubai. But, I have to say, after the Flight experience to the Philippines, all the worry’s were, for the most part, all in the wrong places. To be clear, I’m not talking about the War effort, I’m more saying, as far as travelling issues, Dubai ended up being the least of my worries.

Everything was fine in the UK

Obviously, when it came to the UK side of things, everything was, pretty much, the same as you’d expect, completely status quo experience, for the most part. Although, I will say, I’d forgotten just how bad Terminal 2 is at Manchester Airport, compared to Terminal 1. I’m not just saying that because I miss having a Gregg’s. It’s an awful Terminal, especially when you’re stuck waiting for hours to pass when you can finally board your Plane. As far as the Airline experience, though, yeah, everything was pretty smooth sailing.

Although, if I had to say one thing that reminded you we were not within usual times, was just how quiet everything was, probably the only haunting reminder, really. Something that would stay consistent for a large majority of the journey. Of course, inklings of the lack of normality crept in many more ways. Due to the nature of the compromised Flight, I would be flying at a very early time. Typically, I fly around 1-2PM, meaning I can get a lift to the Airport, dropped off, simple. But, this was very early morning, so, I was never going to be dragging my Parents out of bed at 5AM. As a result of this, I ended up having to take a Taxi to the Airport, that created a whole new feeling to the journey. I still recall picking a more later time to set off in the Taxi, which my Dad was warning against, but, as expected, I was, even then, very early.

The final feeling of a lack of normality, obviously, was arriving at the Airport with … no Seats, booking all-new Seats at the Desk as everything had been re-scheduled. This did mean that I lost out on all my extra leg rooms, and, more. Still waiting on my refund, Emirates… But, aside from that, and, aside from a whole new Country on the final roster… we’ll get to that, the UK was fair enough, in the end.

A very eerie flight, to a rather calm Dubai

The flight to Dubai was rather creepy, if I’m honest, mostly as it was, practically, dead. Entire rows completely free, including, where I was sitting. It all felt very strange. A huge A380, very baron. The seats were so dead that people were using entire rows, with a few covers as beds. Who needs Business Class, eh? Although, I must say, I can’t imagine it being that comfortable. So, there I was, with my own row, watching my downloaded YouTube, bit of Music, then, when I found Blur live in Wembley, thought I’d give that show another go. Although, unrelated, but just to say, Damon has completely lost his voice now, sadly, so, he’s probably better sticking to Gorillaz.

Before I could finish the gig, we were descending. Now, again, if you watch mainstream News media, religiously, I was, at this point, entering into a full-on War zone. Reality, though… it was fine. Honestly, all ran like clockwork. I’d actually go even further than that, I’d argue, things felt more smooth, than normal, due to the quietness, because, yes, like the Plane going to Dubai, Dubai Airport itself was, also, eerily quiet. Personally, I didn’t mind that as I like, and, prefer, to have peace, and I hate people, so, less of them, the better. I’d certainly have enough time to get used to it, though, with all the reschedules under the sun, I ended up with a nice 6 hours to dawdle around Dubai Airport… a few billion times. But, hey, at least I’d get my steps in.

Whilst it wasn’t fun to have 6 hours to wait around Dubai Airport, one… slight benefit, was that I was given quite a few distractions to keep me busy. Well, more assignments, really. Lee had made a request that next time I was in Dubai, to pop into Hard Rock to get him a Guitar with “Dubai” on it. Apparently, for some reason, they make Country specific merchandise. Obviously, with the amount of time I now had, I would have a lot of opportunity to go there, so, had little excuse. Thankfully, for me, as well, this was right next to my first stop, McDonalds. Although, it’s important to note, there’s 3 McDonalds in Dubai Airport, there’s even 2 Hard Rock places, but, the one shown in my picture above are the only ones you should bother with. The others are garbage. The other Hard Rock is tiny and lacks everything, and, the other McDonalds are AWFUL. So, now you know. If you’ve a billion years in Dubai Airport, get to Zone B, and use that McDonald’s.

As I did have a lot of time to kill, I just went all-in, on trying to make the time pass. I headed into McDonalds, made my order, though, it was impossible to not notice that it was me… and, just, the staff, there. No, really, that was it. Thankfully, whilst I was there, a couple of other customers walked in, but, it really was, just that. It was so quiet that the Manager was like, hey, let me check your order, get yourself a Seat and I’ll pass it over. So, I did. Another benefit to when a couple others did show up was so that I wasn’t just being checked every now and then as there was nothing else for them to look at. Made it very awkward, and, that word again, eerie. This wasn’t convenient, as this was my first method on passing quite a bit of time, which, once a few others entered, I was able to do it. Ended up just getting my Laptop out, getting on the WiFi and just pass the time, really. What I didn’t realise, at the time, was that I would have, certainly, A LOT more, unwanted, opportunity to do that… But, that’s for later.

Then, once I’d stayed in McDonalds so long it was getting suspicious, I knew it was time to head out, so, next stop, Hard Rock. I went in, not really sure what I was looking for, but couldn’t seem to find what Lee was wanting, so, ended up Texting saying so, then, as soon as he replied, I … found them whilst going back in on my killing time spree. There was so many, but once he was shown the collection, got one chosen and bought.

Great, all things checked off and, looked at the time… only … 4 hours to go. The rest of the time, was spent with me walking about, getting my steps in, Pokémon GO, videos and music, I can pass time, fairly easily on my own. Though, again, I’d no idea how much that would be tested, going forward.

Time to learn Korean?? Or, should we say, 한국어를 배울 시간입니다

Traditionally, getting to the Philippines, via Dubai, is a fairly straightforward experience. An afternoon flight from the UK to Dubai, then, give or take an hour, transit in Dubai, to then, a final flight to the Philippines. Well, as you’ll remember, that just simply was never gonna happen. This was, of course, what originally led to us flying incredibly early in Manchester, which was, actually, the main reason for the hours delay, but, the frustrations would continue, of course, with the sudden inclusion of South Korea. Although, funny side note, apparently, my Mum, when finding out I was in South Korea, somehow thought Seoul was in North Korea, so, was blurting out in a Pub how I was in …ing North Korea. I mean, hey, that would certainly add …more, to the adventure, you could say.

So, whilst, yes, the experience in Dubai was, honestly, painless and quite decent, the fact I was about to board an Emirates plane going, instead, to South Korea, specifically Incheon International Airport, instead of the Philippines, certainly made things a bit more nerve-racking. But, what could possibly go wrong, eh…

The flight itself couldn’t be more different than the flight to Dubai. This was a real sense of business as usual. Was like a weird experience of leaving Q3 2020 for a couple hours, where you go from nothing, to, huge business back to normal. This flight was packed to the guilds, this was a full flight. Although, despite this, I did still get a middle seat next to me, which is something, I guess. I will say, though, seeing a completely different Country approaching you that you know nothing about, really took me back to the feelings of 2022, all over again. I mean that, more, in the sense that we were really about to enter the unknown. But, what was in store, I could have never predicted, even in my wildest of, low, expectations.

My new least favourite Airport, South Korea’s Incheon Airport

It’s not since 2022 where I’ve been in a situation at an Airport where I’m completely clueless as to what to do. But, at least, back then, there was a sense of normality about this. And, I was, back then, still in the right places. It was stressful, it was worrying, but, even then, it was less stressful than this. Back then, it was status quo, this was all new.

Landing in South Korea, to a banner sign!

Yes, I was one of those special people! Forever, whenever I’ve been flying, I’ve always wondered, as I’m sure you have too, what has to happen to you for your name to be on paper with Airline staff waiting for you… well, it was now happening to me!

Whilst leaving the Emirates plane, there stood a middle-aged Korean woman with a gleaming smile, holding my name, very slightly printed on a piece of A4. It’s funny, but, I almost walked right past her. I wasn’t expecting it, but, you know, when you’re in a moment of alert, things certainly get highlighted at the end of your eye-line. As much as I tried, bless her, I couldn’t really tell a word she was saying, just smiled back and nodded. But, in the end, I was left with that a piece of paper, shown above, showing the very complex journey I needed to do, in, at this point, a very short amount of time. Of course it was because I didn’t have much time, why she was speaking rather quickly. Trouble is, the instructions were very vague, that’s being generous, and, I was completely clueless what the heck was going on. So, I just walked and hoped for the best. It’s important to point out, at this stage, I was around 50 minutes away from my next flight taking off, and yet to even move. I ran down just looking around aimlessly, I ended up joining a very loonngg queue for looked like Baggage and Immigration. 5 minutes passed and we’d not even moved. I was starting to get worried I was about to miss my next Flight. Looking around whilst waiting, re-reading my Sheet another half-dozen times, it became clear, I was in the wrong place. This was the queue for Arrivals, I’m not arriving, I’m moving on. So, I went for it, pushed past in the queue, and walked down the rest of the completely empty and unassuming line. On the way, a man noticed me, saw my Sheet and was like “go, go”, and I was like, OK, but where? I dared to turn left and continues to follow Transfers. Thankfully, this was the right way to go and there I was, in a sea of Shops. No word of a lie, where we ended up felt like Meadowhall times 3. But, where’s the Train, where’s the Concourse??? I was clueless.

There was a Helpdesk I noticed whilst walking aimlessly, granted, this was very busy, but, still, it was a thing. Eventually, the very stressed looking individual was able to… be served by another… He looked, almost, horrified, to see that I was still here once I told him my Flight number, he was like “why are you still here?”, “you don’t have much time”.. perfectly calm things to say to someone who’s already panicking like F. Honestly, I’m just glad I was on my own, I think if I had others to worry about too, I’d of gone.

Eventually, I was told that I needed to walk down to Area 22, or something, look for some stairs opposite this, go down them, and there is the Train. Thankfully, there was, and there was the word I was looking for Concourse, where it soon became clear I wasn’t alone in my little journey.

An unexpected helping hand!

Whilst on the Train, still unsure whether I was going the right way, I was noticed by some Asian man, who, it became clear later, worked there. It’s ironic, but, when I’m not stressed or worried, I hate speaking to strangers as, mostly, due to the fact I hate people, but, when in that situation, I’m more than happy to get someone involved in my struggles 😁. The man checked my Sheet, thankfully knew what it meant, then asked for my Flight number, was able to obtain the Gate number, and invited me to join them all. It turns out, he was in the middle of guiding some Americans on to their next flight. Whilst they weren’t going to Cebu, like I was, they were in the same predicament of not knowing how to get to the correct Gates. Ironically, they were right next to mine.

I’m unsure whether I would’ve worked it out on my own, but, once the Train reached it stop, we all went out, everyone was going up the escalator, but, this Guy and his joined up crew, for which I’d joined, decided to take the Lift. Once up the Lift, was a whole-new sea of Gates and unknown. I was directed to the correct one at 250 / 251. The Gates are laid out terribly in Korea, by the way. Unlike others I’ve seen, you can tell what number they are from a far distance. These? Not so much. This was downstairs into the area.

Flying to Cebu…

Despite the intense rush recommended and warned from the original Korean woman, to the creepy Helpdesk man, I actually arrived at the Gate with quite a bit of time to spare, ironically. But, we were in time, at least, before the Gate would close. I ended up going to the loo, a few times, ironically, not to use the Toilet, but, to refresh myself. Bear in mind, at this point, I’ve already been near 20+ hours into aviation, plus sweating from running around, what felt like the entirety of Korea.

An American couple I, from this point, couldn’t seem to avoid.

Then came time for the boarding. As with most Airlines, the posh gits get on first, then a range of Zones follow. So, what Zone am I… well… I dunno. As my Flight was arranged through Emirates, I had an Emirates Ticket for a Korean Air flight. This meant I had, literally, no information other than my Seat number. Hilariously, this same conversation I was having in my head, I could hear taking place between these two Americans. So, I just piped up and was like, me too, I’ve no idea what Zone. In the end, we all just winged it and queued up after the third one was announced. They’d been booked through Delta in the US, so, must be a thing if you don’t book direct. But, eventually, it was time to get on board.

They’d got on before me as, well, I just wasn’t particularly bothered when I got on. I’ve never understood the intense rush of getting on Planes. The Plane literally leaves only when everyone’s on anyway, so, what’s the rush. Although, I have to say, I was rather surprised and creeped out to realise that the two my Seat was positioned next to was… yep, that very same American couple. Awkward.

Thankfully, though, the Flight to Cebu from South Korea is pretty short, so we should be there in just under 4 hours. Saying 4 hours is a short flight, might seem ironic for those who only fly European flights, but, trust me, from the Dubai flight and the getting to South Korea flight, this is a short one… right? … Guess, we’ll see.

The flight itself seemed pretty straightforward. I have to say it was a decent Flight, considering it was a Boeing Plane, although I’ll always prefer Airbus ones. On the flight, I could hear the Couple talking about it being their first time in the Philippines, what to expect etc. I continued listening to some stuff whilst checking the Flight tracker as we became closer to the Philippines.

That is, of course, until… we weren’t…

That moment when “something happens to your Flight”

Well, at least this one I can’t blame the Iranian conflict for, but, even so, talk about typical. I must have travelled to the Philippines dozens of times, and, never once, has something like this happened. Was it a Plane issue, no, was it a war issue, no, in fact, we’d no idea what the issue was at first. But, what it turns out happened, there been a Volcanic eruption that prevented the Flight entering the Philippines. Somewhat akin to the Islandic Volcanic issues of the 2010s… hopefully not. Now, look, I know it’s not their fault, but, I have to say, how it was handled by Korean Air was, honestly, terrible!

As is always the case on a Flight, when bored you check your Flight status on the screen, to see how far you have to go. So, you can imagine the surprise when suddenly the destination gets inverted back to the original location you’ve just left?? Surely, it must be a glitch, I wonder. Well, we hear nothing, so, must be right? Well, eventually, we get some Announcements. Of course, these are Announcements in a volume only some variations of insect can hear, soooo quiet. But, eventually, it was confirmed that, yes, our Flight ETA has increased to 3 hours, because our destination is no longer the Philippines, but, now… back to Korea… Yeah, so, I’ve spend 8 hours on a Plane to Dubai, waited 7+ hours to even start the in Dubai to South Korea, gone on a whirlwind adventure to find the Gate, to now, again, here I am, on another Plane going right back to South bluddy Korea.

To make matters worse, the real stinger in all of this, we were literally JUST about to arrive. This wasn’t early in to the Flight, this was the last hour. We were moments from actual descent. Ughhhhhh…

I think it’s fair to say, the best way to tell a good or a bad Airline, is how they handle the unexpected. Which, for the record, Emirates are, kind of, bad at, too. Korean Air, took the, let’s just open a closed Lounge approach…yeah.

Arriving, again in a, dead sleeping, South Korea

I don’t think I’ve ever arrived in any destination on a Flight and seen such a sense of disappointment before in my entire life. That usual rush to get your Luggage when landing, wasn’t there. That excitement of looking out the window, that anticipation when leaving the Plane, wasn’t there. It was such an eerie and weird situation. I was expecting to feel that experience in Dubai, but, no, South Korea was the shock here. Again, yes, I know, this wasn’t a South Korea issue, or Korean Airlines issue; I’m not blaming them for a Volcano, but was just an ironic twist.

This was amplified even further by the fact that this is the very first Country I’ve ever gone to where the Airport seems to have… shut down? This is an International Airport, remember, yet, all the Shops were shut, Lounges shut, everything was closed. It was like a ghost town until local time 7AM?? WTF. So, yes, whilst we were invited into the Korean Airline Lounge, it was actually closed, so, they were opening it just for us.

Trouble is, there’s nothing for us there. They were literally rushing as fast as they could, leaving everyone with, essentially, an unlimited supply of Korean Noodles and use of a Coffee Machine… great. I don’t like Noodles, and I don’t like Coffee. Just wonderful. To add insult to injury, they had a Toaster, they had a Bread stand, they had a Meat section… ALL of which were empty as this was closed. It wasn’t actually until when we were leaving that they started to open. If they were open, I could have had some Toast, a croissant maybe, anything. The Bar would have been open. Ahh, missed opportunity. Who shuts an International Airport at night, I’m sorry Korea, but that one IS on you.

This led to a rather ironic thing for me, posting about all my unexpected heroics on Facebook. I ended up sharing to everyone my new found mysterious adventures. Whilst I’d nothing but about 4 Softmints to keep my hunger going, at this point, I did have somewhere to settle, so, found a Seat by some Chargers where I was able to get the Laptop out, charge all my Gear and, well, check in with everyone.

I ended up, first, Texting my Mum as she was panicking like crazy that I was on this world wind adventure. Although, unsurprisingly, was confused why I was messaging so early, but, once everyone found out I was now stranded in South Korea, well, what else can you say.

Then, gave Hannah a call. This was the one I was most worried about. Unlike my original Flight from Manchester to Dubai, I had zero way of messaging anyone about my situation. Hannah was set to meet me in the Philippines, obviously. But, well, I was now 4+ hours later than I should have arrived in the Philippines and, not a mile closer than I was when I last spoke. Obviously, the one positive was that the delay was a Philippine one, so, they were aware. I had these thoughts of her waiting aimlessly at the Airport until the night fell getting increasingly pissed off. Wouldn’t compare to how pissed off I was getting with this journey, believe me. I was getting to the point where I was like, what’s the point, checking if there was any Korean flights to the UK.

The worse thing about all of this, was, the unknown. No one knew when we would actually be able to fly again. Would it be another hour, 2, more? Who knows? Well, eventually, we did and just look at those differences. I was set to arrive in the Philippines AN ENTIRE DAY later than originally planned. Yep, we’d be 40+ hours into aviation hell an zero sleep before even contemplating seeing the Philippines.

But, not to worry, because I have an email…

₩20,000 of Free Food!!! … Once, I can find any…

Whilst sitting on my arse doing nothing for a billion years in the Korean Lounge, I thought it might be a good idea to get the Korean Air app so I could keep track if anything changed, happened, or, whatever. Well, eventually, it did. First, the announcement of our new Flight schedule, then, I got a random surprise of some Korean money from the Airline, via a Voucher to get some Food! The only problem with this, was this arrived right as the Bread counter was beginning to be preparing, all the Shops were beginning to open, and the Staff were saying “hurry up and head to your Gate”… yeah. I found this very confusing as our Flight was literally scheduled over 2 hours at this point. Personally, I think they just wanted us out of the Lounge.

As there was no real rush at this point, in fact, at all, I was then at the point of thinking, OK, let’s find the Gate, but, also, let’s just find some food. Turns out the Gate was pretty easy to find, that’s good. But, now the focus was finding something to relieve my 30-40 hours of lack of sleep, food, and drink… This would be easy in any other Airport, as they don’t close for the night, like South Korea 🙄. But, at this point, things were slowly starting to open.

Then, came the most strangest of sounds. It sounded like an Ice Cream Van, in the UK. I could hear everything from nursery rhymes to Beethoven, of all things, played in a monophonic style way. Was it an Ice Cream Van, of course not, what it was actually was the Airport Vans. Yeah, they travel around playing these songs. It was so bizarre, and, might I add, once you got over the shock, rather annoying. Overall, though, I have to say it’s a nice Airport, it’s pleasant enough, has some nice faux shrubbery and plants to make it look good. Shops are awful, like, it’s got the same Duty Free shop about 6 times in the same 50 square metres, almost.

Then came a massive relief, I was able to locate some South Korean food I could actually eat. Upstairs in the Airport was a small Food court. A Pizza place, a Noodle place (obviously), and what looked like an American-style Fast Food place. “Lotteria” is actually a South Korean chain that essentially is the Korean version of America’s McDonalds or Philippine’s Jollibee.

I saw a symbol for Fries, Ice Cream, Burger and Drinks, and was thinking, yep, we can get something here. Only problem was figuring out how the heck we ordered from it. Like most Restaurants these days, you order through a Screen, then collect. But, I was trying to pay through this Voucher code. Eventually, as I, somehow, gain the ability to speak to people when I’m in a state of unknown, was able to figure out that you order to pay at the Counter, then they scan your voucher. Incredibly, my ₩20,000 [about £10] was barely used, but, obviously, no change, it was one-time use. Surprisingly I got 2 Large Fries, a Large Pepsi, an Ice Cream for barely ₩8,000, which is insanely cheap. I only got 2 Fries cos I felt like, why not, it’s free. Verdict? Well, the Fries were actually pretty decent, but, don’t know if that’s the extreme hunger speaking, although the Ice Cream was awful. The Pepsi was delicious, none of that Sugar Tax crap here.

In the end, I, stupidly, rushed most of it worrying that the Flight might be ready to board. Easily the dumbest decision I’d made, it took AAAGGGEESSS. I should have just sat down, chilled, and enjoyed. But, I was on high alert. Though, I have to say, enjoyed the grub.

Airport slowly waking up, then, there’s movement!

As I said earlier, I still find it completely bizarre that an International Airport shuts at night, basically. But, it was just as interesting watching it wake up. The stores opening up, the Staff all arriving, and the place beginning to get a lot more noisier. Crazy times. Eventually, after all these mayhem, staff from Korean Air began occupying the Gate. As the Flight was, obviously, not meant to still be here, some things had been switched around, meaning we’d need a whole new Boarding Pass. A simple queue, beep-beep, done, for everyone. Shouldn’t take too long, right? … Yeah, we left late because people can’t queue correctly and, for some dumb reason, they picked the slowest most incompetent member of staff to do every-single passenger… alone. Brilliant. Once I had got mine, noticed the American couple and let them know, even though they seemed more interested in abandoning me, how very dare they… I was fine with it, but, was a bit like… OK, fine.

I spent the majority of the last hour just speaking with Hannah. It was morning in the Philippines, at this point, so, was set to, hopefully arrive, successfully this time, by mid-day. Time would tell if that happens. That time came eventually as the Flight began to board. I decided to pick up a second pair of those Korean Air earphones, cos, why not. Never used the first ones, but, thought hey, souvenir.

Flying to Cebu, take 2

This was just a strange feeling Flight, for a reason I’ve never felt before. The Staff, all the same as the last Flight. Passengers all in the identical Seats, it was like a weird combination of deja vu, with people you’re supposed to not know, but, have unintentionally, and, unavoidably, got to know. Was really strange. So, yeah, it was me and the American couple, again, and it really was, Cebu, take 2.

I don’t know if it was my lack of confidence of us getting there, or, just that it was the same thing twice, but, despite the Flight not being early, it felt like a much quicker Flight, and, before we knew it Philippines was again in sight. But, this time, we were indeed ready to descent in to Cebu. Geez, what a journey.

Landing, supporting, then, running?

Upon Mactan becoming clearer and the Plane landing, the American’s quickly began to realise that us landing in the Philippines was the least worried I’d look, quickly assessing that, hey, maybe this isn’t this guys first time. I, ironically, became their unexpected mentors for a few parts of the visit. They started by saying where’s the best place to get Cash? To which I was like, wow, you didn’t get any before coming here? Yes, you can get Cash in the Airport, but, I’d be very surprised if their wasn’t additional fees. The same with a SIM card, they’d not got a SIM card for the Philippines. Yeah, they really didn’t plan this very well.

One thing they had done, thankfully, was eTravel, thought they’d no real idea what it was for. So, was able to guide them through it whilst we all entered the Immigration queue. In the end, despite my initial annoyances with them, it was quite nice having unexpected companions on the journey, in the end. Plus, they even had the decency to leave me alone when it counted 😁.

Once through Immigration, it was time for Baggage. I, always hate going through Baggage, I’m always the last one to come out, I’m waiting years to…WAIT, IT’S THERE!!! I don’t know where I got the strength from, but, as I got to the bottom of the escalator, I could see my luggage just about to leave and go the full circle again and I was not having that. I dashed as fast as I could, and was able to get it just before it left. So, yeah, surprisingly, I was actually one of the first bags, for the first time ever… and, I suspect, the last.

Walking back after collecting it, the American had seen everything and just joked at how the heck I’d found the will to do that, but, greeted them on their way, and we all headed out. The journey was done! We took the usual walk outside, and, well;

We’re here

Without a doubt, the worst experience I’ve ever had flying to the Philippines, but, we’re here, I made it. Left the Airport, and there was Hannah, like the good ol’ days, waiting for me. We then began preparations to get a Taxi.

One interesting additional I’d made for this journey was to use a different eSIM than I usually do. Luckily, for all the unexpected South Korean travel, it actually covered all of Asia, so, even when I was on the Plane, I was able to message and connect. But, it had an additional benefit in the Philippines, Grab baaaa. Yeah, I got, essentially Uber One, but, Philippine style, built in to the eSIM. So, cheaper Taxis (slightly), and Free Delivery on most Food. I was able to try this out, straight away, testing this out with a Taxi to our Hotel. Obviously, unlike anytime before, the Hotel was already checked it, which made things, a BILLION times more easier. No admin, no exhausted trying to look presentable smiles, just enter, and go to the room. This did confuse the Hotel staff, though, seeing someone coming in with loads of suitcases, already with a Room key, but, they got over it.

What followed, after that, what else, a quick Jollibee, to get some grub down my throat, then, a real chill rest of the day. Thankfully, for once, this was fulfilled. We actually did have a rather chill rest of the day. I was absolutely dead to the world, so, unlike most of the time in a Hotel, I did not struggle to sleep that night.

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Slow adjusting to the Philippines.

Maybe it’s ironic, or, just, generally, me bored of the place, but the more I go to the Philippines, the less tourism we end up doing. Don’t get me wrong, if Hannah had it her way, we’d be island-hopping, we’d be going to new places, we’d be in a billon beaches, non-stop. For me, not so much. That’s not to say we didn’t do anything, this isn’t the end of the blog already, but, definitely take things slower now.

Thanks to over 40 hours of aviation and lack of sleep, UNsurprisingly, I was able to sleep rather easily at the Hotel on my first night there. The first night, that was supposed to have happened, 4 days previous, but, there wasn’t really anything I could do about that. This did mean I, unintentionally, avoided staying at a newer house that Hannah’s family had. I’ve never been to this newer house, but, whilst Hannah was selling it very highly, I had my doubts. These would be confirmed, or, denied, in about a week later when we visited the place. But, due to the delay, we were all-in on Hotel again.

Despite this happening, every single time, once again, things weren’t entirely smooth and perfect with the Hotel. Thankfully, though, things were a lot more minor this time around, all involving the Bathroom facilities. Admittedly, one was me, but the other was the Hotel. The showers have always been a little awkward in this Hotel, for some reason using some balancing wire to keep them up, which, never works, but thankfully they also had a roof waterfall Shower head… trouble is, you’ve to, kind of, rush sporadically whilst it turns on. As always, though, the heads are not working correctly, so, it tries to escape the door so a towel is required to keep it in. Other than that, well… let’s just say the Philippines toilets can’t handle what us westerners can …throw out…. Moving on. We also had a brief issue with the Staff not giving us Towels, but, nothing like a bit of complaint and bribery and we were back on track.

Although, we did try one thing in the Hotel for the first time, their Laundry service! I know!! Turns out for just ₱302 … I don’t know why the 2 either … you can get your Laundry done. So, ended up trying it out, we got a ton of our Clothes washed about halfway in the trip. Was very useful, so, yeah, we’ll be doing that again.

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Ben Ben takes priority at the old house

Whilst the beginning of the tip was, thankfully, chill, with just me and Hannah, the inevitable journey to Hannah’s old house had arrived. Although, the main reason for the journey to the house, was, actually, to catch up with her old cat Ben Ben. It’s debatable and questionable why Hannah got herself a Cat in a Country before she was set to leave, and, also, in a Country that doesn’t care about Dogs and Cats so they’re 9 times out of 10, wild and vulnerable. The risk of this weighed its head as the cat has lost weight dramatically in the last year. To a very concerning level. So, the focus wasn’t just on Ben Ben, but, also, getting his weight back to a normal level, and, for Hannah, to plan to keep that consistent. Hopefully, this will be able to be.

The overpriced cost of Animal Food 🇵🇭

A big contributor to why most, typically domestic, Animals remain wild in the Philippines comes down to the extortionate price of Animal foods. Don’t get me wrong, big brands like Whiskas, are still rather pricey here, but, unlike here, in the Philippines when adjusted to the average Wage, the cost of cat and dog food is, for most, unsustainable. Even when put at a direct comparison, it’s more expensive there than anywhere else. There’s no real excuse for it, really, as it’s not rare, it’s not hard to import, just silly really.

This led to multiple journeys out trying to find a good place to get Cat food in the Philippines. Not just for us to find, but, for future reference for family/friend to feed the cat going forward. Granted, that was supposed to be what was happening before, but, things didn’t work out. This led us visiting what was, allegedly, a “new” Mall, which was very old and disgusting, and an ol’ market, yet, in the end, it turned out the cheapest place to get the Cat Food, was actually the nearby Mall all along. So, that was worth it, wasn’t it…

My family were also very concerned about Ben Ben, so, in the end, it was almost like a rescue visit to get him back to form. But, time will tell if, now he’s fine, that will continue. Up to Hannah to make sure that takes place as we’ve no intentions of going to the Philippines again anytime soon.

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Our Second Wedding Anniversary was spent… on a hot sandy Beach

It’s no joke that I absolutely hate warm weather. I, also, don’t particular care for, or like, beaches. I don’t see the appeal of sitting in boiling heat, bathing in pointless sea water, getting sunburnt in the process and, at least in the Philippines, putting up with annoying terrible Karaoke and bad food. So, you can imagine my disappointment when it became clear this would be taking place on our second Wedding anniversary.

Yes, I know, we were always going to end up at a Beach, eventually, but, would have been nice if it wasn’t on the Anniversary. Even though, admittedly, the date was sooner than the original plans. Even so, that’s just how it is. If we do have to go on a Beach, I did have some requests, at least, to try and correct. No stones over the beach, no rubbish looking water, and no, general shithole surrounding it. It was rather disappointing that the Beach we all ended up going to with my Family and Lee was such a bad one.

Was this Beach better? Well, yes, of course, but, the bar was set pretty low. The water was more blue, the sand more golden, but, it still had stones in the wrong places, but, less than the other one. Swings and roundabouts, eh. Everything that ruined the Beach, ironically, was the Philippine touches. On all Philippines beaches, you’ve to pay to enter, you tend to have a rather scruffy looking shack to park, a disappointing Shop nearby and absolutely gross shower and toilet facilities. This one was… no different. The journey was also very disappointingly Philippines, with a 12 seater being used for about 32. I mention this every single time as a serious complaint whenever I pay for a Van, but, it’s never listed to. So that’s why I always get sooo intensely fucked off. Yeahhh, this was NOT a good day, in my opinion.

Despite this, however, I did still do my best to make the most of the day. I mean, after all, this is our Anniversary, so, got involved with all that were there. Spent most of the day with Hannah, her family (both direct and indirect) and her friend Joy. Was nice to have further dialogue between them, many who I’ve really not being able to, even if it was mostly at Hannah’s expense. No one can quite understand the concept of microwaveable Rice, I know, mind boggling stuff.

Ended up getting some alcohol to help the day-go-by, then, before you knew it, it was time to, finally, head off. I was ready to, at this point. As I say, I’m just not a Beach-guy. One nice last minute thing, however, before we headed back was an unexpected Anniversary gift, a Cake. This was given to us by a visiting family member who lives in Manila. Was really nice to get something for the day.

Once we were able to head back, the night was ready for some delivered food to close the day. Can I just say, by the way, had the best McDonalds ever, on a delivery about 8PM, amazing Fries, perfect Ice Cream, very surprisingly good. In the Philippines, they still use plastic spoons so, ironically, I kept the spoon. I hate the awful substitutes. Don’t get me wrong, I’m more stressed with lack of plastic straws, these days, but, it’s something.

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Attending a Family Christening

One of the big events of this trip to the Philippines that was mandatory by great demand, was for me and Hannah to attend the christening of the newest member of the Family. Well, maybe I should be more specific on this, our godchild. Yeah, believe it or not, me and Hannah are godparents to two kids now. But, as this one fell right around the time me and Hannah would be in the Philippines, it.. I suppose, was only right, that we went.

The day started rather, annoying, initially, as, the time was completely wrong we were told, by a whole hour. So, we woke up really early …for nothing. This led to a trip to the local 7eleven where I discovered something… Maltesters are AWFUL in the Philippines! No idea why, but, geez, I had to throw them all away. Had a disgusting Hotdog there, too, so, that was successful. In the end, the Hotdog was, for the most part, given to a wild Dog that Hannah was feeling sorry for. Then, after that excitement, it was back to Church.

Yes, I’m not religious, and, I’m also not fluent in Bisaya, so, this was easily the most bored I’d felt ever in any religious setting. But, oddly, I’d gained two unexpected friends during this, the older sister of the christened child and another member of the family too. My mistake? Well, I mentioned The Simpsons, which one of them was a bit fan of. This would be something, you could say, I would, regret, going forward.

Eventually, the service soon reached its close and it was Photograph time. I feel the need to, again, reiterate, this is not our child. I will say the Candles were rather pointless, I was keeping them safe expecting some ceremonious event to follow, but, no, they just got lit, then, was put out… ok?

Then, before we knew it, it was time to go. As is always the case with Hannah’s family, when I’m a guest, every single person knows what’s going on, except me. So, we all left the Church and were walking, and walking, and walking. I’d no idea where we were going. Eventually, it was found out, by one of the kids, that we were actually going for a Family Meal. Thank you Hannah for telling me … not.

As I’d now gained a new The Simpsons friend, it was, insisted that I sat with one of the kids, which lasted, not that long, as their was to be quite a few outtings. One thing I didn’t like about this particular Family Meal was I knew absolutely no one. There were about 15 people I’ve never seen before. It wasn’t until the absolute end, that, perhaps, 3 of them were confirmed as people involved. But, all of this wouldn’t happen until, what is becoming increasingly common, Hannah had a pathetic moment of moodiness with me, forcing me to do things out of my remit.

Everyone left, initially, to get a Cake, which, I was told to join so I could get some Jollibee. I, personally, wasn’t too fussed if I had one, or not, if I’m honest. But, did what I did. Then, in the end, headed back. By this point, Hannah was moody, so, went in on her own, so, I used her family to snap her out of it. There’s nothing worse if you ask for me and somebody else deciding how you feel, taking actions, on your behalf, based on something that was never true. That was what Hannah did. This time, thankfully, it was short lived, unfortunately, not the case later on. But, we’ll get to that.

But, as far as the days plan is concerned, all went rather well, I’d say. So, what’s the plan afterwards, back to Ben Ben, of course. I mean, that is Hannah’s number 1 priority after all.

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A day of Catch up with Hannah’s friends.

This may sound weird coming from someone who’s, generally, not a sociable person, but, easily, my favourite day of our Philippines trip was this one. We packed a lot into this one, and, I mean, a lot, plus met and caught up with a ton in the process. Before I went to the Philippines, Hannah had actually gone a few weeks earlier, this was for a few reasons; One, she missed the Philippines, needed to catch up with Family etc, and, two, cos I didn’t want to go for a month+. Despite this, for some dumb reason, Hannah chose not to catch up with her old friends whilst she was there herself. This makes absolutely no sense, and is a further reminder why women are incredibly illogical. They’re also very stubborn as both sides were on a … I’ll wait till they ask me. Absolutely stupid. As a result of this stupidity, Hannah wasn’t able to catch up with a few people, but, if you ask me, serves her right. But, we did catch up with a few all in one day, which is where we get to here.

Kartzone Cebu (…or more like Korea)

Initially, this was supposed to be the only plan for the day, as it was the only one Hannah bothered to tell me about, but, up first was Kartzone in Cebu. Admittedly, on the advert, it looked more like a children’s thing, it was actually quite a lot of fun and, happy to say, no children here. What there was a lot of, though, was Koreans. Yeah, for some reason the Philippines seems to be getting very South Korean oriented. All the writing was in English and Korean, even some of the Malls had Korean as the chosen second language, odd. It’s almost like South Korea will be the third major country to take over the Philippines after Spain and the US. Either way, we headed in and .. slowly, waited for Hannah’s friends to arrive. Though, it wouldn’t be the only thing they’d be slow at.

Fresh from her time in Japan was Hannah’s first Grace friend of the day we’d be seeing, alongside Godelyn, who I’d not seen since our Wedding. Once settled in, we were ready to get Tickets bought. I will say this, it wasn’t exactly cheap, but, that didn’t stop us getting two of the damn things. In the end, all 4 of us would be riding individually, then, after we were to try riding together in the dual-seat Karts. This did mean, however, we’d have to wear some very flattering covers over our faces, which were quite challenging to get on with Glasses, for sure. Then, once we looked like we were going to rob a bank, we were ready to go.

Ride 1: Me and Hannah solo

Me and Hannah were first to be able to get to riding. So, Hannah had instructed the others to wait in a risen up area, almost like the middle part of a Tennis court. So, with Grace and Godelyn on photo duties, me and Hannah were ready to go. Similar to when I rode on a Jetski, I went all-out. I mean, why not? You’re supposed to have fun, if you ask me. Hannah, by comparison, was a lot more conservative in her approach. But, she did still accelerate where it mattered, others that would follow, certainly didn’t.

Being as fast as I was, it wasn’t hard to lap Hannah, quite a few times. Trouble is, I completely lost track of how many laps I’d done. I think I might have finished early, but, I still had a lot of fun. Then, it was time for roles reversed. We were on photo duties whilst the others rode.

Ride 2: Grace M and Godelyn solo

With me and Hannah “comfortably” embracing the awful Philippine sun, we were both on Camera duties for the other two. I will say, if me and Hannah were to be compared, we were an Olympic running team, versus, a Snail. OK, I’ll be fair, Grace M was about as good as Hannah, had decent speed and went pretty well.

However, let’s talk about Godelyn. If it took me about 40-ish seconds to get around a Lap, Hannah might be a bit over a minute with Grace around the same, I think Godelyn must have been easy 5 minutes. She certainly took her time, quite a stroll. This was straight from the get-go, I think she was scared of actually pushing the peddle down. Despite this, however, she was the only one of us who actually CRASHED!!! I KNOW!!! How the hell do you crash when going 1mph, who knows, but she did.

Once she was “rescued” from her, somehow, crash, she was able to complete her laps in another few hours and we were able to go ho… ohh, wait no, we were going all-out-again. This time, we’d be taking the dual-Karts. It was agreed, for obvious reasons, that Grace would be driving in their pair, and, naturally, me and Hannah would have me driving.

I wasn’t, particularly, happy, to be wearing those Masks again, but, on the other hand, I had a lot of fun, all over again.

Ride 3: Me and Hannah dual-Kart

This was a lot of fun, but, I don’t think Hannah was, quite, prepared for it. Despite the two steering wheels, only the right seat had any control of the Kart. So, I was driving, whilst Hannah attempted to capture as much as possible. I don’t think she was ready for just how fast I was aiming to go. But, as I said before, to me, if you’re going to do it, go all out.

So, whilst we were zooming approaching the corners, Hannah was like “BEEEAAAANNNNN”, and I was like, what? 😁. So, I’m not sure, in the end, whether Hannah actually enjoyed the journey, but made for a good ride. It did mean that I wanted to go that extra mile, so, for one corner I deliberately heated it and we did a cool 360. Not enough to crash, but, enough to get Hannah.

Then, before we knew it, we were back on Camera duty whilst the speedy-gonzalaas coupe were ready.

Ride 4: Grace M and Godelyn dual-Kart

For obvious reasons, as previously stated, it was decided that Grace would be driving, otherwise there’d be no time for dinner. Of course, without her driving, it did mean this went far more smoothly, so there was less issues and all was done before you knew it.

This time was a bit more awkward to capture, as there was another woman in the upper stand trying to capture her flame. But, once they were both back, we were able to head back and it was time to go.

Quick bite to eat, before heading off.

A very short walking distance away from Kartzone was quite a few options for eating, including KFC and, of course, Jollibee. In the end, the choice was made to go to Jollibee, for the simple reason I don’t like anything at KFC and I’m bluddy paying.

With assistance, I was able to get my custom Jolly Hotdog, with them getting some concoctions of various edibility and it was soon time to head out. It was only, at this point, that I was actually told that this was not the only thing we were doing today and would, in fact, be also catching up with quite a few more. So, it was time to leave, say our goodbyes, and get a Grab prepared. So, as we were walking out…ohh

Yeah, this was a nice awkward moment. On the way out, who did we bump into than Chona. Yeah, the same Chona who was Hannah’s former school friend who was there with us in my first trip to the Philippines back in 2022. I don’t get involved with spats between women, I think it was more the others that were the reason for that, but was nice, yet awkward, to see her again. But, what made it even more awkward..er, was Grace insisting that she knew her from school whilst Chona was pulling the most who-the-hell-are-you face, back at her. But, we couldn’t just stand there forever, so, gave her a smile and said nice to see you, then we headed out. Apparently, she works nearby. Then, taxi was there, said goodbye to the other two, and headed to..wherever we were going.

Drinks with even more catch ups.

As the Taxi headed to what looked like the middle of nowhere, it became clear that this was part 2 of the catching up with people. This one we caught up with another Grace, who I’ve always got on with, Cris, who I’ve never really got on with, who was joined by her new American boyfriend, and Riza. The place itself was really strange, it was like a collection of chairs in an outdoor area, with a weird stage area, some outdoor barbecue foods of Philippine disgustingness, and a random convenience Store. They don’t know how to go do drinking establishments the Philippines, it’s weird, but, hey.

First up was food, everyone ordered some strange disgusting mess, whilst Hannah caught up with everyone and, before I knew it, it was just me and this new American. He was, quite literally, every single stereotype of an American you can get, southern accent from the hood, black, and, whilst getting on a bit, was actually quite a laugh in parts. Spent most of the time trying to loosen the false stereotype that the Philippines locals have of the West, whilst attempts to see how mature and witted everyone was happened, with mixed results. He spoke about how Cris was perfect for him for many reasons, mostly, she was fair, not materialistic, not obsessed with money, mature, and, obviously, they loved each other. Believe me, when It comes to the Philippines, those characteristics are very rare!

It was very revealing how all the girls were all like, when you getting Married, are you going to have children, are you moving in, moving away, doing this… all life-changing and huge decisions that need serious consideration, but, in the Philippines, everyone just wings it at stupidly young ages and buggers up their future. It’s their culture. But, was interesting how much we agreed on, between me and the American. After the grub, next up was some Beers, which, Hannah didn’t contribute to, as she’s very anti-alcohol, something which is not a Philippine stereotype at all, everyone likes Beer typically. Then, once consumed, it was time to go…ohh no, once again, we’ve further destination. It was time to Karaoke.

The night ends with a bit of KTV / Karaoke

After a brief slow walk down the Streets of the Philippines, we ended up heading to a Karaoke bar. Karaoke is a whole new world in the Philippines, there’s booths everywhere, so, we headed in, and got comfortable. During the Karaoke, they made the decision to order what resulted in the most undercooked Pizza I’ve seen in my entire life, with, of course, more drinks.

Then, it was just, non-stop singing. I wasn’t really sure what to sing as one of the more infuriating things about KTV bars in the Philippines is, they’ve, basically, never heard of most decent UK artists. But, despite this, I still got myself going singing a rather unusual pairing. I went from Clint Eastwood by Gorillaz, including the rap, which is one of the few I knew off-by-heart, to, Kidz by Take That.

Just when I thought I knew everything about the American’s stereotypes, though, I was surprised that he didn’t mind my Take That song, but, also, out of all the songs that he chose to sing, he made a very unsuccessful attempt at Vertigo by U2. So, was quite surprised by that one. For some reason, he thought I’d be good at singing Green Day’s American Idiot, which, was a very poor ironic choice of band. Personally, I hate Green Day, and everyone who’s a big fan tend to be… let’s just say, mentally challenged, needless to say, I didn’t go there.

Then, it was time to head out. As transportation in the Philippines is bad to impossible at night, the only choice was a Taxi. So, we said goodbye to Cris and her bf, then, the rest of us shared a Taxi back.

Was pretty late by the time we got back to the Hotel, but, I have to say, was a pretty good day so was quite happy with it overall.

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Day trip to see the “new” House and an outdoor scenic location!

Whilst, I could describe the catch up day as one of the best, this one, probably goes down as one of the worse. It was time, it’s been incredibly over-sold, but, I’d yet to been able to see for myself, it was time to go to the “new” House. But, one thing I didn’t realise, was just how looooonnnngggg this day was going to, both, be, and feel.

Maxim is rubbish

But, not before a massive collection of frustrations when it comes to, actually, get there. The new house is located in Maga, Cebu, which is outside of the Grab area, meaning that I couldn’t get there using a Grab. This is something that really frustrated me, because, this proves that the location was too far away, to not have any backup plans. One service that would get us there, was Maxim, a Grab competitor which is absolutely garbage. I got the app to pay by Card, which the Driver rejected and demanded money, trying to get a Ride, resulted in rejections and multiple delays. And, that’s not even the biggest frustration, but, we’ll get to that.

But, eventually, it was time to go. One good thing about taking a Taxi was, at least, we had a Seat. In the end, two were actually arranged, for us and the rest. This meant that, in reality, it was, actually, more expensive than renting a Van. Sounds about right.

The journey itself was long, slow, but we got there in the end. During the journey, we got a bit confused as our Hotel, Summit Hotels, is noted as having one in “Naga”, but, it turns out, in the end, it’s actually Naga in Manila, not Cebu. I distracted the time with a bit of Pokémon GO, Arnel took a detour to get some Chicken, then, we were here.

The “new” House, and, surrounding emptiness

Originally, to reiterate before, the plan was for me and Hannah to stay at the families new House, before, heading back to Cebu city for the Hotel. Due to the cancellation due to the Iran conflict, that, didn’t happen. So, in the end, visiting this House in Naga, only happened on a day visit. Let’s just make it clear how VERY GLAD I am it ended up that way. This is NOT a good place to stay.

It didn’t help by just how over-sold this place was. I was told this was as-good, to, better, than my home, I was told we could stay cool with Aircon, I was told it had a lovely surrounding facilities like a Pool, and more. Then, reality kicked in. If anyone’s ever gone to Spain, or, quite a bit of tourist Europe, there’s a lot of white coloured shacks, all in a row, all in the middle of nowhere without decent transpiration. Yeah, you get the picture. The pool was actually a community pool nearby, there’s no shops, no convenience other than little nothing places, it was dead. What followed was a very long few hours of sheer boredom. The house was boiling, too, so, yeah, if we had to stay here, I doubt I’d of lasted a night. … Well, I would have done, as there’s no way to get back, easily, but, you get what I mean.

A trip to a scenic location

I think my struggles and immense boredom was contagious, as, thankfully, we were able to get out of there. We ended up heading to mainland Naga, to some very scenic location with lights, and outdoor location. Getting there was rather amusing, we all travelled through a push bike-thing, I forget what they’re called again. I will say, whilst most of the House didn’t impress me, it’s not a bad looking place Naga, specifically and, oddly, the Bus stops with all illuminating lights. Eventually, we got there, and, out the Cameras came.

This was also the first, of many to follow, occasions where it became clear who perhaps, shouldn’t, be the one taking the pictures, but, this was found out too late. So, if some pictures seem a bit off, whether balance, or, otherwise, it’s Arnel’s fault 😁.

As this is the Philippines, by the time we arrived, it was nightfall, pitched black out, and a very nice clear sky it was too. It was a very strange place, on one angle you’d odd lights toys you’d expect at an amusement park, then, on another, random shops, to then, scenic bridges and coastline. Definitely not somewhere I’d choose to go, but, was decent, I’ll admit.

The only thing that made the night a bit annoying, and this was just the beginning, was the fact that everyone had to have a few dozen pictures, EACH, in every single bluddy angle, but, that’s Philippines. That wasn’t all the night had to offer, however, as it turned out the main location, or, intended location, was yet to be visited.

The next location was actually pretty impressive. Above you you’d find lights, around you you’d also find lights, surrounded by walkways, waterfalls and more. If you are as obsessed as 99% of all Filipinas are at photography, this is the place to go. This was a great way to increase the photo collection, for sure.

Although, in reality, most of the photos were solo pictures Hannah was taking, with the other Filipinas joining in their own variation on their next profile pictures. The only thing they weren’t doing, thankfully, was TikTok, so, I’ll give them that. As amazing as the visuals were, if I’m honest, once you’d seen it once, you’d seen it for long enough, so, by this point, it was time to go. Plus, by this point, it was getting on a bit.

We’ve no way of getting home…

You may recall how I was talking about how absolutely useless and rubbish Maxim taxis were. Well, they were about to reach their peak of being useless. Because, despite the issues we had at the start, at least we were able to book one. This time? Not so much. Yep, it was approaching 9PM, we’ve about a hour to two journey ahead of us and… no way of doing it. This is no joke, we were literally stranded!

Any positive I was trying to get out of this night, completely reversed. This was the worse moment ever. The thing about people in the Philippines, though, no matter the severity of anything, everyone just..doesn’t care. Literally, careless is the truest word to describe people. Everyone we were with, baring in mine, in the same situation, were completely like… ahh, oh well. I was like, are you for real? How we getting back?? No one bothered. Did they know what to do? No. So, how did we get back? Well, in true Philippines fashion, blagged it and it somehow worked out.

Whilst we couldn’t get a Taxi, we could, at least, get a Bus. And, well, we just went for it. A bus went passed, claustrophobic as ever, going in the general direction we hoped to go, so, we just go on it. Thankfully, this Bus was going the right direction, though, not exactly in the most comfortable way. This thing was going WAAAYYY too fast, especially on downhills. Then, everything just suddenly stops for Customers, then, zooms back in to fifth gear. All this whilst unsure whether we were even going to be making it back.

The Bus reached its final destination. Hannah and co decided this was the time to get some Fruits at a local market, but, thankfully we had entered the Grab zone, as I’m calling it. Yes, we were able to actually book a Taxi that could get us home. Of course, due to how many of us their was, we had to get a 6-seater, so, we’d a bit of a longer wait, but, at least we actually had one.

Once the Taxi finally arrived, it was time to enter. I struggled, with the rest of us, to figure out how to work the Seat to let people into the back, then, we were in, and, before we knew it, we arrived back. Everyone headed back to the old house, whilst me and Hannah headed to the Hotel and had a long deserved sleep.

Phew. What a journey. This trip is just surrounded by chaotic journeys, isn’t it. I’ll admit, though, I wasn’t expecting one whilst still in the Philippines. But, it’s just typical of when with Hannah and her family arrange things, or, in this case, don’t bother to arrange anything.

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The photogenic wonders of Vivace Art Café, then… it all gets a bit rubbish.

After a few chilling days of souvenir shopping, it was decided, by Hannah, that we should go to a new location to get some photos taken. Located next to Ocean Park, Cebu, is now this new Café. Now, I know what you’re thinking, why the hell would I want to go to a Café, I don’t like anything Coffee and Tea related. Well, this very bazaar location, is the setting to quite a photogenic experience.

Never in my life have I visited somewhere where the entry requirements to go in, is a Coffee, that’s new to me, but, that was the case here. To make matters worse, or, more disappointing, I don’t think anybody actually enjoyed the Coffee. You couldn’t even just get a Coffee or Tea, it was weird concoctions of meh. But, regardless, that was what you had to do. Once you’d purchased your completely unwanted Coffee, you were able to enter. Hannah had made the choice to go with 2 of her family/friends, with the idea that they would be the one to take our picture, and this would, essentially, be a romantic photo session around this location. Fine with me. Or, it would be, if that’s how the day, actually ended up. But, it did start that way.

Whilst I had my doubts about the place, from what started as just a video on TikTok, I will say, in person, it’s definitely quite the atmospheric location. It’s nothing too fancy, on paper, the first room is just a dark room made up of around a dozen projectors and a screen with some relaxing, intended, music. Whilst, as I said, I was fine with the intended plan of the day, it was pretty early into this, even as soon as this first floor, that it was clear this was never going to be the day it was sold to me. Already, it was becoming clear that they were taking the focus, Hannah was giving them that focus, and I was the odd one out wondering what to do, then, told to smile in sudden shots. Shame, really.

It was clear this was noticeable, as their was a few times where I’d, essentially, grab Hannah away from them to try and make it, again, about what this day was supposed to be, about me and Hannah. Despite this unfortunate situation, I will say I don’t regret us going one bit, because it really did, surprisingly, deliver on everything it promised. It was picturesque, especially when you got upstairs to be the main area, and, well, the shots speak for themselves.

Moving through the locations was rather overwhelming, at some point, with some situations where we were almost waiting for the patterns and colours to transition to something a bit more photogenic, or, possible with the dark lights and quickly changing colours.

Of course, if you struggle to take pictures yourself, throughout the experience, in certain areas, were photographers that would take photos for you. Now, you would expect that these pictures would be in very high-grade quality and, despite the always over-priced ending for this, they’d look ok. Well, Hannah actually paid for one at the end and, I’m not saying the iPhone 17 Pro is the best Camera in the world, but, compared to their photo, it was night and day. The picture they took was blurry, out of focus and rubbish. So, that’s why it’s not included above.

If the day ended there, or, heck, maybe a bit of whatnot shopping or something, I’d of been fine. This would have been a very surprisingly better than expected day, with a few niggles, and we’d be good. Unfortunately, that was not the case. My issue at the beginning, came back full circle and extended 5 times fold. The focus, almost immediately, went away from this being a day about me and Hannah, to being, all of a sudden, a day about Hannah spending time with the two she’d brought with her. This wouldn’t be an issue, IF Hannah hadn’t literally had weeks to do something like this, before I came. That was the point of her being in the Philippines before me, was to spend time with her family and friends in ways that I wouldn’t be able to either enjoy, or, be what I was ever going to. That is why I was so annoyed about what came next.

An unintended tour of every SM, to escaping a children’s play area.

As this was located right amongst SM Seaside, it was only natural that this would be our next stop. This was perfectly fine with me as we could get a bite to eat, and see what’s happening next. But, this was just the beginning of frustrations that took place thereafter.

Hannah had decided that they were actually going to go to some play area, so, the expectation was that this was more of a Toilet trip, before heading out. Under this impression, when we went to Jollibee, I just got a drink, thinking that this is all we’re doing anyway. I then asked, whilst ordering, does anybody want anything? I was told no, so that was the reason I didn’t get any Food. Also, why did it take soooo long to get just a Coke, no idea. But, what really annoyed me was they ALL ordered Food, then, Hannah acted annoyed she was paying for it?? I’m sorry, but, you literally said no, whilst I was ordering. No, really, this created a frustrated mood between everyone vs. me! Are you serious?!

This mood and feeling, just never went away, no matter what I did. Completely undeserving, as well. To the point where we, after their Food, went to the Taxi rank where I was essentially told to fuck off, whilst they had a good time. Unbelievable. To this day, looking back, I’m gobsmacked at how bad I was treat that day. I decided to tag along, so I could try and be with Hannah as much as possible, last time I checked this was supposed to be our day.

A growing illness didn’t help, to, shopping on my own for an hour…

Following the big Karaoke and catch up day with Hannah’s friends, I’d frustratingly gained a cold which, even whilst writing this, I still have remnants of. This is pretty common, every time I go to the Philippines I get ill, it’s just the location itself. If it’s possible to be allergic to a Country, I am. This meant that even whilst trying to be in the best of moods, you always kind of look depressed or pissed, due to being unwell. As a result of this, me and Hannah ended up going to a Pharmacy where Hannah took over leading to us getting medication that does nothing, to then losing the other two, finding them, then, it was back to the original intent.

Eventually, we all went to where they all wanted to go, some kids play area at the top Floor. To this day, Hannah, who’s 30 in a couple years, claims this is not a kids play area, but, I’ll let you judge that for yourself. They ended up getting an hour in the place, with me refusing as, one, it wouldn’t even be for me when I was young, and, two, let’s be real, I’d look like some creepy pedophile going there. Again, why didn’t Hannah go with them when I was not in the Philippines yet…

Despite my annoyances, I just agreed to let them go in, I would have a mooch around the Mall, which was, frustratingly, the smallest SM I’ve ever seen… and then I’d meet them back. Of course passing the time with little-to-nothing to do, led to an unexpected solo shopping experience.

I’m sorry, what, Sainsbury’s!!!

Whilst I wasn’t too impressed to be given an hour with absolutely bugger all to do in the smallest SM Mall I’ve been into, you could say I’ve had a bit of practice wasting time in annoying places, so, in the end, I decided to just make the most of it. Plus, I did have a few things I needed to get… ok, in reality, I just needed some socks… but, still. The question now, though, remains, how do I make getting some socks last an hour?

Well, to be honest the first half hour wasn’t much of a struggle. Had a bit of a walk about, played a bit of Pokémon GO, even if it was a bit harder due to the Mall being so small, but then, it was time to actually pretend I’d things to do. I had to be one of those people who goes around shops and browsed. How do women waste 30-40 minutes doing nothing in Supermarkets and be entertained, trust me, it’s hard.

I began by getting myself some socks, wasn’t hard to be honest, there’s plenty of places that sell them. Despite this, the ones I bought, in the end, are actually a bit too small… par for the course in the Philippines, but, that’s 10 minutes down… only 50 to go.

Then, I had a random moment of memory, and decided to look for some of those Fruit sweets I’d had previously in the Philippines, so, it was off to the Supermarket. I know, I was living life to the max. Though, I did find exactly what I was looking for rather swiftly, but also a few others. I noticed Hannah’s Calamsi juice is cheap as chips in the Philippines, and, surprisingly, they actually do sell Brown Eggs in the Philippines. This might seem random, but, Hannah insisted they only had White Eggs over there. And, they were not imported.

But, one big surprise was finding another Supermarket inside SM, none other than British Supermarket Sainsbury’s. Well, not quite. But, it was definitely rather amusing seeing just how they were displayed like some miraculous luxury brand, when, in reality, it’s just some basic biscuits made for Sainsbury’s. Even though, it’s nothing special, I thought why not and got some, in reality, expensive, Custard Creams because why not.

Eventually, the hour was through. I was armed with my infamous Sainsbury’s Custard Creams, my Fruity sweets and my Socks, even if I’d find out they were too small later. Whilst I wouldn’t say I had fun during this hour, one thing that didn’t help was a bunch of annoying Filipinos constantly asking for money and expecting me to be this rich individual. Stupid, really. But, it’s what you expect.

Another, for no reason… well, I’m off

To add to the, already increasing, annoyances of the day, they were late to get out of their 1 hour session. Despite the 60 minute session, they were called out, more, 75. But, it is what it is. Once I’d passed some more annoying Filipinos tried to be knobheads, they were finally out and it was time to… still dawdle around doing things with some deliberate attempt to annoy me. As I said at the start of this, this was supposed to be a day for me and Hannah, with the two coming as photographers and company. Unfortunately, this ended up being just a day for Hannah to ignore my existence and do things with people she’d know I wouldn’t be able to get involved with, then, somehow act like an annoying idiot and pretend its my fault.

Well, this reality hit its true peak. The gang decided it was time to get something to eat. Trouble is, due to the Mall being so small, their wasn’t much of a selection to choose from, so, we’d need to move out, and, we did, to …another SM. But, whilst ventures around continued to avoid a Restaurant that was too expensive, in the end, they settled at… a Restaurant… at an entirely other SM, that was too expensive anyway.

More Korea, being told to F off, then, in true woman fashion, it’s my fault…

Whilst, I, obviously, wasn’t incredibly happy to be where I was, because, who would, I still put my foot forward to get involved. Shared a few jokes between the others, pointed out things of note around. We were going around for quite some time, actually. I think Hannah was hoping to find some budget place with Jollibee prices, but, without that budget feel. This didn’t work out, so, in the end, the choice ended up being some weird Korean BBQ Restaurant. You just can’t escape the Koreans, for some reason.

I will say this, it was certainly a unique place. Typically in a barbecue Restaurant, it just all in the Kitchen, but, with this one, you were part of the experience with each Table having its own chimney whilst you cook it all yourself. I mean, it’s a good excuse for the Restaurants to avoid any charges for Food poisoning, I suppose 😅. To the surprise of absolutely no one, there was nothing I would be able to eat. The thing is, though, this was always going to be the case, and, I was getting pretty sure this was the last stop, so, whilst, yes, I was bored whilst they ate, that was fine. But, for some reason, Hannah just returned to her weird pathetic mood, and I was booted out.

No lie, over three times, I was told to go away, during them eating. This wasn’t said subtly, this wasn’t said quietly, this was said openly and loud, whether Hannah bothers to remember this or not. I’m sorry, but, I’m pretty thick skinned when it comes to shit being said about me, but, this was too far! Did I look bored, sure, I was, but, this is normal and not a big deal. But, for some reason, Hannah took this as some insult for no reason and told me to, essentially, fuck off. Initially, I refused, just saying, I’m ok I’ll let you all eat. But, no, it continued. Hannah alleges that the other two were finding me not eating awkward, as her defence for her pathetic behaviour. Fact is, that’s a load of bull and she knows it, deep inside. Eventually, I’d had enough and I was so upset, and, hurt, by how Hannah had treated me, I just didn’t want to give her any satisfaction, so, just walked off and didn’t return.

A Taxi scammer, to, manipulation.

I was so angry, I remain angry looking back and putting myself back in that situation. What a pathetic day, all down to one person, Hannah. She chose to ruin it. Thankfully, after our myriad of SM Stores, the one we’d ended up at was, thankfully, close, to our Hotel so just a quick cheap Taxi back is all it took. I mean, I could have walked, but, it was like 9, at this point, so was probably not the best idea to walk.

As the Philippines is full of scammers, the second anyone in the Country sees a Western white man, they scam, this was the case with my Taxi back. I’ve taken this journey in a Taxi enough times for me to know exactly how much this should cost. We’re talking ₱80 max. Before we’d even moved, the driver was like ₱250!!! Any other day, I’d of walked out, or, told him to get fucked and turn on the metre and stop being stupid. But, I was in just a bad mood, I just wanted to get back. Once back, it’s not a long journey, I headed up to the Hotel.

The intention, should have been, to get something to eat on Grab, with Hannah returning shortly. Well… she just, didn’t. Half an hour, then, an hour, then nearly 2 hours it showed she was at her old house. OK, makes sense, she’s to take the others back. But, nothing in terms of communication. Then, it got even later, still nothing. I’m sorry, this is the person who’s ruined the day for me, for no reason but her own selfish self, yet, I am the one being treat like shit even more, for no reason. Eventually, I’d had enough and messaged. Ohhh I’m sleeping here tonight, oohhh it’s your fault, ohh this. I was soooo fucked off!

To this day, I’ve not forgiven her for that. That was a fucking joke. You can tell, even now, just how angry going back to this situation, made me. This manipulation bullshit has been a poor trend for some time between Hannah and me, for some reason, and I’m not having it anymore. Seriously. I deserve better than this.

The day after, I woke up after, honestly, a rather refreshing sleep, I’ll admit, to … still nothing. What the F is wrong with her. So childish, so pathetic. I’d had enough, so, I just went down the old house myself. In the end it turned out it was, really, just Hannah and her Mum in the house, so, wasn’t too hard to get to her. Believe it or not, she had the cheek to suggest I was there “to make it up to her”… unbelievable. I didn’t even humour such bullshit. Just said, this needs to stop, then, the day changed back to Cat focus and any other stuff that was going on.

Cat escapes

Of course, whilst there, Hannah had spent the night, not with me Ben, but, her cat Ben Ben… try to keep up. But, they have two Cats at the house, with another one called Yan Yan. This Cat is white, a lot more timid, and, unlike Ben Ben, I don’t think really is ever included or cared about that much. You can tell this as it’s never priority when any Cat things are purchased, and, it just has zero affection towards anyone. Getting a Cat to be affectionate towards its owner is basic, so, the fact she hadn’t for anyone, is revealing. This probably isn’t helped by the Cat constantly in a Chain, so it doesn’t esc…. ohh

What will go down as one of the, initially, creepiest things I’ve ever seen out of a window; whilst in Hannah’s room, we heard this very strange sound and then out the window, chains come down and a circle head attachment. It looked like the setting for someone to get themselves hanged… it was creepy. But, no, Yan Yan had escaped her chains. This led to a rush upstairs to try and get her back, but, she was having none of it. The Cat ran on to other roofs, which, themselves, are just metallic coverings, so, with parts of Chain still partially attached, it was rather noisy when the Cat was moving about.

The decisive moment occurred, however, in that Yan Yan had no intention of coming back. If this was Ben Ben, who’d jumped out the window to another roof, he could be easily tempted back and he’d jump back in when ready, cos he’s loved. This, to me, was proof that this Cat never was. And, she never returned. Bittersweet, depending on how you look at it, but, yeah, just Ben Ben to look after now.

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Visiting the same SM three times, then, a Family Dinner… in SM, then, Starbucks… in SM

Just when you think I’ve seen enough SM Malls, this was going to take that to the next level, but, at least, this had some level of tradition attached to it. As is traditional whenever I go to the Philippines, one thing that has never changed, on the last day, it’s always a family Meal. But, what was certainly not on the typical list is visiting the same SM three-times in a single day to do so. To be clear, this wasn’t the original plan, things just seemed to just work out that way.

REASON FOR FIRST VISIT OF THREE

The first time we went to the SM was actually with the intent of finishing off a growing collection of souvenirs that Hannah had been building up to gift to friends here, from work colleagues to friends. This, however, didn’t work out, on the SM side of things as the souvenir shop in the SM Mall didn’t have an item previously confirmed as being wanted. So, we ended up going to the SM, to leave the SM to go somewhere else to get what we were planning on getting there in the first place. Yeahhh.

To get the souvenirs, we’d be returning to this discount area like Colon. This also housed a very big discount Supermarket, where Hannah purchased, no lie, about 15 different varieties of tinned Beef, an unnecessary amount of Crisps (..sorry chips, they’re yanks in the Philippines), biscuits, another thousands packs of Noodles and spicy varieties of Fish, like Sardines, that make you gip your stomach clean. Hannah also made a side street shop very happy by purchasing dozens of Fridge magnets, including the one above, which was our favourite, and some t-shirts. The rest were key rings from a souvenir shop, but, question was which to get.

One rather amusing anecdote that came from the first visit was going in the souvenir shops, taking a picture of everything there, Hannah would get a list of what people wanted later. For her to come back, with the intention of this day being the purchase date, to find out she’d unintentionally took one home. Honestly, criminal. Although, the first trip back in a Taxi was not amusing, for me, as, outside of the Driver not knowing where our Hotel was, I ended up making it back to the Hotel, with the staff “helping” with our Bags by dropping the Car boot on to my head 😡… I was not impressed. They were never the same with me after that.

But, on this second day out, despite the failings at SM, was able to get all the left overs and key rings, then head back to Hannah’s house, where everything would be packed and prepared for the coming last day there. But, surely we wouldn’t be back at SM until the Meal, right… right???

REASON FOR THE SECOND VISIT OF THREE

Admittedly, this reason was a pathetic one. During this visit to the Philippines, for some reason, specifically during the Christening, as you’ll remember, two of the Family kids seemed to just magnetise to me so I’d two unintentional friends that wouldn’t leave me alone. This meant that I was, somehow, coaxed into getting them a McDonalds Happy Meal. Whilst, it would have probably made more sense, with all two, already, expected SM visits, to get this on a Grab delivery, no, we went there. So, it was back to the same SM we started, and, coincidentally, would end the day, at.

Getting there was a journey, though, as Hannah decided to take the budget route and take a modern Jeepney. This would have been good, if it actually got us there. Yeah, for some reason, it took a side street, parked up and never went any further… bluddy typical. So, in reality, we lost out on that and was walking the majority of it. Lesson learned for later.

We heading right into the McDonalds, which, to be fair, is right at the Entrance, and waited a billion years to get served and receive our Food. I decided to get myself a McFlurry to tidy myself over, and, steal one of their two included Cokes to drink. Once we’d ordered and got the Food, a million years later, we headed back to Hannah’s house, where we were all ready to prepare for … yeah, a third visit to the same SM. BUT, at least this time it was the last, and, the, real reason for going. So, for the next few minutes, to hour, Hannah would spend as much time as possible with Ben Ben, before, it was finally time, to head up to SM.

VISIT THREE: THE FAMILY MEAL, ITSELF!

Getting to the SM, for the third time, was done via Jeepney for everyone else, but, based on just how uncomfortable and absolutely packed it was, I was having none of that, and insisted on a Taxi. Despite this, somehow, we got their last. Well, I guess, in reality, it makes sense as they were already on the Jeepney before we’d even ordered a Taxi, but, even so, no regrets.

Once we got there, eventually, we met up with the ones already there. As had become oddly traditional, my fan club was there who insisted on holding my hands, which led to use basically just parading around and being annoying. Hannah took this opportunity, to be, typically Hannah, and film this moment, to which we paid her back by sneaking back at her and ordering the kids to attack her. Eventually, though, we made it to the place where everyone would eat, and, I would sit. Tables all set up and we began to get ready for the Meal.

One thing that was rather strange, and, I wish I had a picture of them, was the glasses the restaurant had for the water. They were completely lopsided. This led to some humorous banta from myself to others mocking this, much to the amusement of Revie, and, even Hannah’s Mum at some points. Then the very disappointing looking Food arrived and everyone began consuming. But, not before a slight detour to get myself something I could eat, whilst Hannah got a Cake which, if I’m honest, I don’t understand why she did as it was very unappreciated.

In the end, it turned out the Food was meh, the drinks were overpriced and everyone was done, so, it was time to head off. This was an attempt, by everyone, to try somewhere new for the Family meals, I think, in the end, it was a lesson to just go back to basics and somewhere you know is good. I doubt we’ll be there again, next time.

Hannah treats everyone to Starbucks

In a combination of making up for the Meal, and, well, it was Hannah’s turn to pay, came a treat that only Hannah would suggest, Starbucks. To me, it’s an overrated poor example of piss-poor caffeinated rubbish… to others, it’s a statement, so, we were off. As there was about 12+ of us, we needed to find a decent sized, and, not too busy, one. Eventually, whilst going downstairs we found one. Hannah was a bit disappointed at Allison, a family member, who decided to go to an ATM, then to a doughnut shop and get herself and only one other some doughnuts randomly without including anyone else. But, that’s just par for the course of how a bit spoiled that family have become really.

As is the case everywhere we go, before the Starbucks could be DAARREEDD to be purchased, out came a billion senior citizen ID cards with an attempt to reduce the bill. To me, I don’t see the point of any of this. I don’t know if anyone realises this, but the cut it takes off is so minimal for the effort you put in. In fact, when there’s more than just 2, they don’t even take any more off, so, don’t know why majority bother. For Starbucks, it was even worse as they only allowed discounts on the single drink associated with the person. As a result, I think Hannah saved, no exaggeration, about ₱20, which is less than 30p. Not worth it. As everyone was drinking at Starbucks and I’d no idea how long we’d be there for, I dared to get an Orange juice that… had pips and was awful… woo.

Once everyone had drunk their Starbucks, after everyone individually seemed to have a few hundred selfies with them, it was time to go. We’d reached the end.

That end of the last day, feeling

Before we knew it, the time had come, the end of the final full day in the Philippines. I think this is true of anywhere you visit, but, it’s only when you get to that, end of the day, nothing else left, time of the final day, that you get a brief moment of awww it’s time to go. For Hannah, this feeling was real, very strong and you can tell as the stroll to get home was an exceptionally slow one. As for me, it was very aww…. I’m over it now.

Yeah, whilst it came for a brief minute, I was very ready to get out of the Philippines. Although, at the same time, a bit nervous surrounding what could go wrong in the journey back, once again, through a War zone. Sure, yes, the drama, whilst deep and intense, getting to the Philippines, in the end wasn’t life or death… it was still stressful, still annoying, and, well, I did have work the day after I returned.

Although, speaking of the journey home…

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Our flight home, cancelled, without even being told it was! 😱

THIS has got to be the worst experience I’ve ever experienced, thus far, with Emirates. No, seriously. Let me set the scene, for you. Our flight is on Saturday, to head back to the UK, with original plan to be to land in the UK, after the usual transit bla-bla-bla, on Sunday around 7am. The positive to that land time, you’ve time to get your luggage, get home, and collapse for a good few hours so I’m, at least, presentable for work on Monday. Well, that didn’t happen…

I have no idea when this happened, but, on Thursday before, we were on our way back from our Souvenir shop, you remember the one, Car boot in to the back of my head… thank you Hotel staff. Well, it all started with a quick double check to a question, I already knew, with Hannah’s family just asking what the time was for our Flight. I already knew it was 5PM, but, I opened my Emirates app, just to, basically, show it. Well, I opened the app and… everything went blank. The flight was there for a few seconds, then, Philippines slow mobile data loaded and… gone! WTF…

Initially, admittedly, I didn’t think too much of it. The app is probably having its moment, and, just in case, I’ll get it up on the website when I get back. But, I did remember that I have the booking Reference in my Email, so, I’ll just find it real quick … “Incorrect booking reference” … whattt!!! Then, when I did get back to the Hotel, it got even worse. I logged into my Emirates account on my Laptop… “You have no booked flights”. Hannah, being the carefree she was, was just like ohh that’s weird but ok, until she checked her own and the same happened to her…

A panic through Socials…

Now, the real problem with this was the fact that I was in the Philippines. If I was still in the UK, I could ring the Emirates number, but, I was in the Philippines with no calls. So, how the heck am I supposed to figure out what the hell is going on? Emirates are on social media, so, I attempted messaging them on FaceBitch and Instagram and… just got robotic empty replied. They never replied on X, and, concerningly, no one else was talking about this being an issue. I did find someone on Reddit (which I wish I didn’t) explaining the same scenario and how they had to pay for a brand new Flight costing them thousands… great, now my heart rate has doubled again.

Eventually, we got a breakthrough! I’d attempted to contact Emirates through their Live Chat features on the website. This had never worked in the UK, through the many times I’d had to re-arrange, but, thankfully, 30 minutes of this being left in a window on my Laptop (which, at this point, I’d forgotten was still open), I got a reply, we were in! But, obviously, at this point, I’d still no idea what was going on.

We’re in, eChat success… phew

I’ve absolutely no idea what I would have done if this eChat didn’t work. Well, we’d of had to go to the Airport, but, this is really not good. Eventually, the Emirates representative informed me that our Flight had been cancelled. I made it pretty clear how frustrated I was that we’d not even got an Email saying it was cancelled, a Text, anything. All I got was a scripted apology, but, seriously, that’s poor!

Another surprising aspect to all of this was which Flight was cancelled, it wasn’t the Philippines flight from Cebu to Dubai, it was actually the UK flight to Manchester. So, they were actually able to restore the original Flight and, for the first time, our Seats, as well, for our Philippines Flight, which was a relief as it would be business as usual to begin with. However, when it came to the final Flight… yeahhhh.

The big irony surrounding all of this, was we did get an Email on Tuesday, suggesting our Flight to Manchester had changed, which was pretty wild as it was set to give us just 40 minutes to transit through Dubai. That might seem like a long time, but, believe me, if you’ve been to Dubai Airport, you know, that’s a VERY short amount of time. But, unfortunately, that very short amount of time was to be contrasted to the most ultimate possible way… just read this;

12 freaking hours!!! I know I said that I wouldn’t have minded by delays on the way to the Philippines, as much, if I was with Hannah, even so, that wasn’t me wanting one. I will say now, just FYI, it’s better without Hannah, in these situations. We just both have the opposite idea of how to pass the time. I like to walk about, pass the time, play a few Games. Hannah, on the other hand, likes to sleep. How the hell anyone sleeps in an Airport, on a Plane, in general, boggles my mind, but, trust me, she can.

So, there we were, we were able to get both of our Flights, as I did mention in the same chat about Hannah being my Wife travelling with me, sorted in the same chat, meaning that the good news was we were still flying on the Saturday. Well, I don’t think Hannah would have complained too much for a forced extra 24 hours or more… I bluddy would have. Bad news, of course, what were we going to do in the huge 12 hours. Well, that’s something we’ll get to shortly.

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Time to go, our Flight day!

Well, after quite the journey to get there, and… admittedly not the best time I’d ever had in the Philippines, it did have some highlights, but, we were finally here, the day where we headed back to the UK. You couldn’t have two people with more different impressions of that reality. Hannah was begging for a way to stay. I was begging for it to be now. Although, whilst I know Hannah loves the Philippines, it did get a bit annoying how many times she battered on about it, still doing it now.

As far as packing was concerned, I was pretty prepared. The majority, and I mean, pretty much everything minus hand luggage, was already packed and ready before the Saturday began. Hannah, on the other hand… not so much. And, despite going to that budget supermarket and buying a billion foods, Hannah still wasn’t quite satisfied so, believe it or not, we were set to head out again to get a bit more. Although, I did wean her off getting too much. I wanted to get a 6 pack of Red Horse Beer, just to allow family to have some, Hannah wanted some more Calamansi drink. So, we got our beverages all sorted pretty easily.

One last Jollibee, then, once back at the Hotel, time for “the” Mango??… and checking out!

Whilst out on the last shopping trip in the AMs, we both went to Jollibee and had some Philippines food for the last time, before we flew. We had to check out from the Hotel at 2PM, and, our Flight was not until 5PM, so, we’d have a few hours to kill, between, basically, not being allowed in our room. Thankfully, though, you can check out, but, also, request the Hotel store your Luggage to collect later. This was a life saver, as it meant there was no carrying our Luggage around. Good thing, really, as Hannahs was incredibly heavy.

I’ll admit, I’m not entirely sure why Hannah’s bag was so heavy. I mean, yeah, a few tins and drinks might add a bit of weight, but, after that it’s minor amount of clothing and Noodles, ohhh, and, her family, to quote exactly “my family are bringing over the Mango”. I’m putting in bold, an important distinction, between what was said, and, what will soon be found out as reality. You’d think the one Mango, right… hmm.

Mangos in the Philippines are completely different to ones you get in Countries like the UK, so, there is a decent reason to bring some back. Definitely more reasons than the myriad of Beef tins, which, literally are available here, but, Hannah logic.

Once all our Suitcases were in the Lobby, stored in the Hotel reception for collection later, we had a good hour and a half, before we had to get a Taxi booked for the Airport. This was spent at Hannah’s house, mostly, with the two of us in Hannah’s former bedroom, with Ben Ben, who was now looking far more better than what he did when Hannah landed. Something that will need to take focus to make sure who is supposed to be looking after him, do so.

This wasn’t, exactly, a pleasant situation, as, the house was boiling, but, the time finally arrived when we would return back to the Hotel. One, additional, benefit, to leaving our Bags at the Hotel reception, was that it forced us to get the Taxi at the Hotel. Every single time we get a Taxi from Hannah’s house, it takes forever! Mostly, as she’s in the middle of a very busy road, so, holding your hand out forever just results in 90% nothing. Whereas, at the Hotel, Taxis are already anticipating guests wanting one, so, immediate.

A dreadful Taxi driver, but, we made it…

Finally, it was time. The Taxi arrived at the Hotel and we went inside. As is, pretty much, always, the case, we weren’t alone and a couple of Hannah’s family insisted on coming. We ordered a 6-seater, mostly, to ensure we’d somewhere to put the Luggage, really. The journey was, generally, fairly typical, busy roads, stressful moments of wondering what would happen if we were late, that never really come to pass.

One thing that certainly wasn’t good about the journey, the driving. For some reason, this Driver was moving like he was either desperate for a piss, or, trying to compete in a race with an invisible force. Very uncomfortable with the guests almost hitting the roof with the amount of bumps in the road. So… yeah, he didn’t get a tip.

Whilst the Airport at Mactan is easily the quickest to get through, in terms of check-in desk to being right at the Gate, that doesn’t stop the Airlines insisting on the usual times to be there. So, we still arrived to “Last Call”, on the list. So, it was pretty much goodbyes and get inside the Airport. I still find the Philippines very pathetic at how they don’t even allow you go inside without some forensic proof you’ve a flight, but, there we go.

Check-in chaos and… wait, 25KG, how?? Could it be Mangos?

Now that all the issues involving this Flight even taking place was resolved, you’d, expect, by this point, we’d know exactly what to do and everything would just go smoothly… well, nothing is ever simple in the end, is it. As far as getting to the check in was concerned, there was, honestly, nothing for me to worry about. The getting home is never the worry, it’s the leaving. As for Hannah, though, she’s to contemplate the UK’s rather temperamental eVisa system and more. Which, decided to just not want to load for a good bulk of time, which was… convenient…

As a result of this, it was decided that I was checked in, whilst we waited. Although, to be clear, as is typical in the Philippines, it was just us at the desk, so, the pressure wasn’t, quite, there for us to be as soon as possible, I guess. I was checked in, all good to go, then, Hannah was finally able to get the eVisa loaded. But, wait… what’s that…

Yeahhh, Hannah’s bag was certainly edging quite dangerously towards that 25kg baggage allowance. Big question was, well, how? I mean, I know she had a lot of Noodles, tinned food, and, sure, a few drinks, but really? Almost 25kg amount… madness. It wasn’t until we got home that we would find out the real reason for that… a very fruity reason.

But, she was still within allowance so, was all good. Rather amusingly, Emirates put a sticker on her bag warning that it was heavy.. you’re telling me. Then it was time to head through. Probably my least favourite aspect of leaving the Philippines are these desks on the way before Baggage control. The crazy thing is, you can literally see the Baggage area and the view of one of the Gates, you’re so close, but you’ve some awkward buggers to get through first. As I knew Hannah would be the hard one, I let her go first, in fact, joined her at the desk as there’s no way we’re going through without both. And, of course, issue.

Although, admittedly, this was a minor one, on paper. To enter the Philippines, you need to fill out an eTravel form. It’s a load of rubbish, if I’m honest, but it’s something you’ve to do in South Korea, if you recall, and, quite a few others too. No idea why. However, to leave on another Passport, you just, well, leave. On a Philippines Passport, which Hannah is still, for now, still on, you need to also fill it out when you leave. We… forgot that. So, we’d to scramble and fill it in. Thankfully, if you’ve done one before, you can just log in and it removes a few options from being needed to be put in. However, it wanted to be awkward and wouldn’t let us advance to the final point on Hannah’s phone. Now, I’m not sure if this was due to Hannah’s phone being absolutely dreadful with her touchscreen, something that was even stressing out the Airport staff trying to help, but, we just couldn’t get it to advance. Thankfully, a man noticed at the Airport, then, seemingly just looked at the screen and it advanced… creepy. But, we were in. Thankfully.

Interesting tidbit; It turns out the reason for Hannah’s phone being so dreadful for her touchscreen after all this time, yeah, it was her screen protector. But, not in the way we thought. It turns out all these last few months, Hannah has been using a screen protector, on top of, another screen protector. Yeah. This explains why her phones touchscreen has been so damn useless. Ironic thing about this, I complained about her screen protector and got a full refund for it, with the seller letting us keep it, yet, it turns out it wasn’t. Oops. But, this wouldn’t be found out until a good week or so after returning to the UK (yes, we did get back, we’re getting to that), but, still mad really. I only noticed as when replacing the screen protector, after Hannah scratched it, I could see dust at the edges.

Checked in, then, it’s time to really go ✈️

Once we were all checked in, it was a fairly short wait, in reality, until the Flight was ready to be off. Despite seeing them less than probably 30 minutes ago, Hannah was back on the phone with her Family, who’d made it back by this point. No idea what they were talking about, as, in that short amount of time, I can’t think what there is to say, other than, bye. Either way, that somehow made it to a 20-30 minute call. Then, the Flight began to be boarded.

We both decided to head to the loo, which was a good opportunity to get an easy photo next to the Plane outside, as above. Then, it was indeed time to get on. The time waiting before boarding the first Flight was my first, real, inkling, of how different this journey was going to be with Hannah. If I was on my own, I’d of probably used this time, to have a look around, have a quick walk, but, with Hannah everything felt rather locked-in. I felt like I had to be there. I didn’t really like that. But, what can you do.

The flight was ready to board. This is my least favourite of the Flights you do from the Philippines to the UK, at least, with Emirates, as you basically have two Flights without getting off the Plane. Normally, I’d say, time always goes quicker going back, which, might have been true, if it wasn’t for the transit time increasing by 12 hours! Ughhh. Anyway, let’s go

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Philippines to … Philippines again, then, Dubai

Despite everything, I have to say the Flight from the Philippines to Dubai was, pretty much, like clockwork. Everything happened when it should have. The flight starts with a 1 hour trip from Mactan in Cebu, then lands in Clark, which is just outside of Manila. The annoying part of this Flight is actually the wait between the landing in Clark and taking off again for the actual destination of Dubai. But, I suppose, in reality, there’s people getting off the Flight, and others getting on, with Luggage and other things to deal with, but, still not fun when you’re there.

One thing that was, kind of nice, in the end, what our Seats. On the first flight, we were just on regular Seats with someone on the window Seat. This was annoying for Hannah, only for one reason, as they wanted the windows shut when it took off. I’ve never known anyone do that, so, we were relying on the screens. But, we would only have to deal with them for a very short while as they actually got off in Clark, and no one replaced them on the Seat. So, we’d a nice free Seat and the row to ourselves.

Shortly before we began descending in to the Philippines, on the Clark flight, though, Hannah decided to get our picture taking by Emirates. We would do this for both Flights coming home. Admittedly, this one wasn’t as good thanks to our other guest sleeping on the window seat, and, not helped by the Cabin crew rushing it, ruining it, by it losing focus on the Seat in front. Ahhh amateurs.

As I mentioned before, we had the row to ourselves, at least, on the flight from Clark to Dubai, and, honestly, everything went rather smoothly for the duration. Another niggle, though, did kick in, with Hannah deciding that we should watch a Movie together. Now, Hannah is obsessed with Movie watching, I, don’t care for them. Not helped by her choices. She decided to pick this weird horror movie, which, we did watch together. I can’t remember the title, but, children were getting captured by some clown looking fella, with some girl who could see future, weird one it was. Personally, I thought it was shit, but, Hannah didn’t think it was bad. She even suggested watching the sequel on the second flight, which… she did, but, not me.

I’d actually downloaded a ton of stuff to watch on the Flight, but, was unable to really watch as Hannah insisted to do things together. I thought it would be nice travelling together, and, don’t get me wrong, it had its moments of being, but, I guess I prefer being more independent in some ways. On journeys, I like to just isolate with Music, or, whatever. No chance of that this time. Just a long 10 hour Flight to endure. Then, before we knew it, we were in Dubai.

And, we better get used to it, because we’re here for the longhaul, that’s an understatement. It was, at this point, that my body decided that my Philippines illness would take over and be absolutely dreadful to deal with… ugh. Yep, I was not feeling well at all! And, with Hannah being the pharmaceutical industry’s biggest unintentional chill, we had to go to a Doctors, or else… Well, let’s get off this plane first. I’ll admit, this was one flight, neither of us were really rushing get off. Was it late, on the one time where it would have been slightly beneficial… of course not, we had the full 12 hours to kill.

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12 hours in Dubai Int. Airport… during a neighbouring War

Yes, this wouldn’t be the first time I’d be in Dubai with, seemingly, a billion years to kill, but, putting it down to rough numbers, we were double the amount of time, from my 6, to … 12 hours. To make matters worse, I was now completely full of it… yep, my nose was blocked, my throat was shit, and, even I was getting to the point where I was thinking, yeah should probably get something for this. I do think flying on Planes doesn’t help with all the intense Aircon and blowing.

As soon as we left the Plane, I mean, we tried to be slow, but, everyone’s always in a rush to get off, so, we didn’t really benefit. As is the case with everything, the immediate beginning was Toilet, Hannah took a million years in the Toilet, then, we were at our new home for the next 11 hours and 40 minutes… what to do. Well, Hannah decided this rather quickly by asking a man, who was, clearly busy, where the closest Pharmacy was. Then, akin to me being asked where the Gate was I was stood at, before, the man pointed to, basically, right next to us, where, indeed, a Pharmacy was. We walked in and there was this rather moody and tired looking Indian working there. Hannah was like he’s blocked nose and sinuses, and, she didn’t say anything, apart from picking up two things and going, take dees… OK. As you’d expect, being at an Airport, they were far from cheap, but, hey, if they make me feel better during the many hours to come, not a bad thing, right?

Well, spoiler alert, both of them never worked and did nothing positive to me. Great. In fact, they would later contribute to a brief moment of incredibly uncomfortableness. So, I’d go to hate them in the end. One was a medicine, to take every 4 hours, that tasted like gone-off piss, and the others were, oddly, Tablets that are tiny, for your sinuses that you take once-a-day! I know, I found that suspicious as well. But, took first dose of both, then, we started heading further into the Airport.

After already spending over 6 hours in Dubai Airport when I was going to the Philippines, I knew the place inside out, at this point. Minus a few, I thought that was A-zone, in B-zone, but, if I could see certain places, I knew where I was going. I, for one, was hungry, as I think was Hannah, so, that took centre stage so we headed for the “good” McDonalds, that I went to on the way.

Getting a bite to eat.

I remembered on the last long visit to Dubai Airport that there’s a good McDonalds … and the others, whilst Hannah wouldn’t, and, didn’t, believe me, at first, this would become very clear, eventually, in the end. But, for now, we were here at McDonalds. Now, you’ll recall just how absolutely dead the McDonalds was on my way to the Philippines, although, it certainly wasn’t the case this time around. I’m not saying it was business as usual, but, was, for sure, much busier than last time. All of Dubai was, to be fair.

By this point, I had already promised Hannah that we’d try to find her some, more Asia inspired grub, so, as a result of this, Hannah only got an Ice Cream Cone. Yeahhh, McDonalds in Dubai have Ice Cream in a Cone. It’s crazy the amount of differences that McDonalds have around the world. For me, though, I, kept things traditional.

I also got a Large Coke which, to this day, Hannah is convinced is the reason I had some, coming up later, issues… what I think became clear a week or so after this point, was, it was the Medication, but, hey-ho. Once I’d finished at McDonalds, which, I’ll be honest with you, I was rather annoyed at Hannah for this. Let’s not forget, we’ve over 11 hours to kill, Hannah’s already eaten on the plane perfectly fine, I hadn’t, so, when Hannah was rushing us in McDonalds saying it’s time to go I got a bit pissed off. What we should be doing is chilling, no rush, taking things slow. Ahh well.

Once taken out of McDonalds, faster than planned, it was time for Hannah to have a bit of a rest, until we were back out for her to get something. We ended up finding an Asian chinese-esc place, so, it was time to see what Hannah could get. I’ll say this, though, it was very pricey…eeekk. But, eventually the Food was served, just in time for Hannah to drop the bowl and lose about 15% of it over the table…. so danghag. It was a weird place we ended up at, and, seemed to be like the abandoned side of the Airport. No one was around, it was like before around here. It had old-school gaming machines you used to find in Pubs in the 90s, an ice cream shop next to it which was abandoned, weird area. It was pretty cool that the Tables had wireless charging, though. As is always the case when I waste money buying food for Hannah, she eats a few bites says it’s alright… to get leave the rest… yeyyy -_-

Although, this wasn’t as bad as the second time we tried McDonalds. Hannah just didn’t believe me when I said there was a good one, and, a bad one. This time, we went to the bad one which, no word of a lie, I think tried to kill me. The fries were barely cooked, they seem to stick to your throat, I could barely swallow it, and… what a surprise, there I was, choking like crazy and having to run to a, thankfully, nearby Toilet to gip. Trust me, if you want a McDonalds in Dubai Airport, there’s only one you should ever go to.

Trying to sleep, whilst a little issue arises

Despite the fact that Hannah was able to sleep on Planes, and, quite frankly, anywhere, she still was insisting we spent the majority of our time… sleeping. This was annoying, for me, as I can’t sleep on an Airport chair, I can’t sleep on moving transport, so, I was never going to be happy. On top of this, I was full of cold, the medicine wasn’t working, so, you get the idea, not in a good mood. Then, something happened. Something very concerning considering how things were, hours away from being able to leave, and a long flight afterwards …

Bit awkward to talk about really, but it all started after going to the loo. One thing I hate about Toilets in Dubai is they seem to have an absolutely insane amount of water in the bowl before flushing. It’s weird. I’ve to balance in a way to stop being underwater. Anyway, I went to the loo, to get rid of the McDonalds… all seemed perfectly fine. Until, something happened. Almost as soon as soon as I’d walked back to where Hannah was, no lie, sleeping. I felt like I needed the loo again. But, couldn’t go, no matter what I tried, but felt like I needed it. Hannah was all, I know everything (she’s never ever right when she’s like this) and was like, see soft drinks, that Coke you shouldn’t have had, bla bla bla. (As I said, it was proved in a weeks time it was the meds). In the end, I ended up filling myself with as much Water as possible.

Water is cheap in Dubai Airport, especially in Duty Free. We ended up going to Duty Free to get some and some other things too. Look, I don’t like to stereotype, but, something happened at Duty Free that just made me go… wow, they’re even like that here. Some Muslim women were in front of us, they had a ton of stuff and it was all scanned through the checkout. They even had physical UAE Dirham so they were clearly able. But, then the price was announced, they, instead went on their phones, made a few calls, a few rants and started saying “ohhh not this then”. The checkout man was very annoyed. As was the guy behind me who had about 3 items and was like, hey, my Flight is in 5 minutes. The man simply told them to go away, banned them, and moved to the next checkout. But, yeah, crazy how they’re actually like that everywhere.

Thankfully, the more Water, I drank, the more times I struggled to go, and, by more own inclination of stopping to take the medication, it did after a few hours stop being an issue and I was able to drain. As I predicted, and, where Hannah was wrong, it wasn’t the Coke, it was the meds. Thankfully, I was able to stop this being an issue before our flight. But, yeahhh, not a fun time.

Longest, and, most boring wait in the world

With the exception of getting more overpriced meds, this was the most bored I was in my entire life. When I’m bored, I like to occupy myself, I like to move, I like to hang about. Couldn’t do any of that. So, what I ended up doing, sat down, bored, charging up our stuff. This journey was, easily, the best use of my KUXIU Charger. Being able to charge, not only my phone, but also, my Apple Watch, with a portable charger was huge. Even if, Airports are trying to ban them.

But, when Hannah was sleeping, or shutting her eyes, I couldn’t just walk off because she’s sleeping so what if anything happened to our stuff. And, she was too lazy to go for a walk. Ughhh.

Eventually, Hannah had enough of pretty much pretending to sleep, plus, wanted a coffee. So, we ended up getting up to get a Coffee. Which was, unsuccessful, but, it turns out for a very crazy reason.

Evacuation at the Airport !!!

As we’d literally lost where the Starbucks were, we decided to compromise at a Costa. But, where were the Staff?… Dinner break, surely not. They were, literally, all in a bundle a while away. Was sooo weird. So, we just sat down and waited, until, something, rather odd, happened. A member of staff came up to us and literally, told us, rather rudely, to get lost, then… “stay away from the windows”…. umm okk.

Then, it was made clear, there’s an evacuation. We were all called to a section of the Airport, all together. Quite a crowd of us had gathered, at this point. Although, ironically, I think we arrived late to it. Thankfully, though, this was short lived. We were, initially, under the impression that we would be heading down a lift in front of us, to avoid something. You see, that’s the thing, that something never got mentioned here. And, if you’re a news person, it never really does get, just in case. Think “don’t mention the war” in Fawlty Towers.

Whilst we were all gathered, and, yes, whilst an Evacuation order was, initially, confirmed. In the end, that’s all it was, we were able to move forward within minutes. The ironic thing about this, out of the 12 hours we were spending there, this all happened in the last hour before our Flight. I was less bothered about whether it was an Evacuation, and, more like… don’t you dare cancel our Flight.

Time to check-in … phew.

After the drama, boredom, and, in my case, almost, additional illness, we were finally able to move into the check-in area for our Flight. One good thing about this Flight, we’d booked a nice seat for us both to share. But, we’d still a bit more waiting, just yet.

Hannah decided to go to the toilet for a few billion years, then, it was time for us to board. I’m happy to report, the visit I did before going on the Plane, confirmed I was back to being ok, at least, with that. My cold… that was still very much here. But, wouldn’t peak until we landed.

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Dubai to Manchester

It’s only after flying a Boeing Plane, you realise just how better Airbus ones really are. I know I said that before, but, it’s so true. Although, admittedly, this flight was quite a shaky one at parts.

It’s funny because, this isn’t the first time I’ve made the choice to book a Seat on Emirates with 2-seats. Typically at the back, you can book Seats on the Planes that aren’t the 3-seat ones, or the 4-middle ones. But, never before have we experienced them like this. I think it’s because the last time we did, it was on the Boeing one. On the A380, we’re upstairs baby. Though, not in the Business and First Class part, sadly. I’ve always said, one time in my life, we’d proper go for it, but, knowing my luck I’d still probably not be able to sleep 😁.

Like with every Flight, the food was pointless, for me, at least, but at least we were able to enjoy the Plane. Interestingly, we had our own little drawer built into our row, which was nice. What wasn’t nice was the kid in front of Hannah constantly dropping her things and moving things her way. The kid did, eventually, get told off by the Parent for being an annoying cow… aaaaanyway.

The rest of the flight consisted of Hannah watching the sequel to that rather weird Horror movie I was forced through, then, after that it was just a collection of music, the odd clips I’d saved to watch on my phone and general interactions before we finally made it to the UK. Of course, this is Hannah, this involved a billion selfies, as well as this, a much better pic taken by Emirates. This time, just us. Then, thankfully, our journey was over, we had landed in the UK!!!

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Land-ahoy in the United Kingdom!

I’d say, quite accurately, about 50% of us was happy about this, and, I’d also say, the other 50% sure weren’t hiding that they weren’t, either…. Yeahhh, Hannah wasn’t even trying to hide how disappointed she was to land in the UK. I mean, I know she’s just spend 6-ish weeks in the Philippines, but, still, surely there’s something you miss from here, too. Plus, you’ve 25kg of the Philippines grub coming back with you.

This is, now, only the second time, me and Hannah have landed in the UK, together. First time, naturally, was when we were all coming back after the big Wedding trip. Back then, there was Lee, and my Parents, waiting for us down at Baggage collection whilst I waited, very patiently, for Hannah to be done in Immigration. Things were, a lot different, this time around. I thought when I left Dubai, that would be the last Airport I’d visit that would be suspiciously quieter than normal, but, hey, Manchester surprises. I mean, I know, due to the Flight cancellation, it was pretty late, at this point, but, still, seemed very bare. Positive to this, of course, is we could get through it, or, at least get to a Desk, in Hannah’s case, much quicker than normal.

My Passport results in a bit of irony…

When you return to the UK, with a UK Passport, it’s supposed to be a pretty simple experience. Like returning on a Train, you should be able to scan your Passport, like a Ticket, the doors open, and off you go. My Passport just doesn’t ever feel like doing that. I can recall only ONCE it ever working as it is supposed to. You can your Passport, it looks at your face in the process, and, nothing. Now, I know it’s not my Passport, entirely, as this scan system was what was used in Dubai, and that worked fine, so, something in the UK systems that just doesn’t think I exist.

So, ironically, I had to go to the same queue, akin, to the queue Hannah was on for International Passports. Don’t get me wrong, once I finally got to a Desk, it was very, scanned, beep, ok off you go through, but, this bluddy Passport. I’m not looking forward to paying for it renewed in a couple years time, but, at least that’s one positive that should be alleviated when I do. Hannah, on the other hand, was, ironically, able to get through to the front of the queue, be seen by a member of Staff and was let through in a matter of seconds. This meant, make-it-make-sense, that an International Passport was able to get through to the UK, quicker than a local British Passport. Sounds about right.

I’m always last in Luggage, and, saved by a bit of writing! 🧳

Once we were both through, I guess, at least we didn’t have to wait for each other, the next top is a stairway down to the Baggage collection. We were quite far away this time, I’m sure we were like 7 or something. As always, and, typically, whenever I have to collect my Luggage, whether it’s in the UK, or, the Philippines, 9 times out of 10, I’m always last. Yes, you could argue, based on how quickly I got mine in the Philippines, I’m owed a bit of a wait, but, still, back to status quo.

My Luggage is red, which I’ve had since it was bought for a Birthday a couple year back, and was purchased and chosen as it would stand out amongst the other generic Black bags etc. Well, let me just say this, that would have not been the case, if I had hadn’t also written a few things on my Luggage. Now, I’m not talking about, ohhh it’s the same colour, ohhh it’s a bit similar, no, the IDENTICAL bag went through Baggage control. It made Hannah go, ohhh there’s yours Ben, and, it made me go, ohhh good there it is. To the point where I was moments away from telling Hannah to begin setting off. Was it mine? No. But, it was the exact same Bag. Mine, thankfully, had some BEHANN text on it, as well as the sticker from Emirates with my name on it, but, the key noticeable was the BEHANN, and, it’s a good job I did as I might not have noticed it till later…

Meeting my Parents in the Car Park… once we could find it…

Once we made it through Baggage collection, we had all our Bags, I told my Parents, who were picking us up, that we were all ready, so they’d head up from a nearby spot they typically wait, before going through the Airport, and we’d both have a quick Toilet visit.

Then, when we headed outside, it was rather crazy that it was getting dark whilst arriving in the UK. Every time I’ve landed in the UK, it’s been crack-a-dawn, about 6AM to 8AM, so this was a very different experience…. thanks Emirates for that cancellation -_-. Then, it dawned on me, this was Terminal 2, not, Terminal 1, a further reminder, if it was ever needed, how much I hate Terminal 2, by comparison at Manchester Airport. It’s sooo illogical of a Terminal. Eventually, I found the Car Park, which, I “hoped” was the one my Parents were, apparently, at this point, lost in.

The experience of finding them, however, was not helped by my Mums sense of direction. Once I made it past the Lift areas, you are able to go to the Car Park area where you, typically, are able to just be picked up. Well, I started at “0”, so, I let them know I was there. My Mum however, decided that they were on “1”, so, I was ok, fine, so we headed to the Lift, went up and then rang her again to let her know I was on the same Floor…. to then be told, ohh wait, no, she was on “0”. I mean, I’ll let her off, slightly, as you expect the first floor to be 1, not 0, but, this meant we again would be on the Lift, back down, to then be on the same Floor. After that it would be aimless walk back and forth with my Mum on the phone trying to spot her. Thankfully, I did, I told her to turn around and waved, and me and Hannah walked towards them…slowly. Look, we’re tired, ok…

An unwelcoming from Hannah, a thank god from me… with an unfortunate Cold, then we were off

Look, I mentioned before, how I knew Hannah was sad about leaving the Philippines, but, I don’t accept or excuse how she acted when she first met my Parents again. They were very positive in their greeting, had gone out there way, very late, on a Sunday, to pick us up, for Hannah to be like… I don’t want to be here, I’m so disappointed to be back. It’s not a massive deal, but, come on, do the right thing. Even if you are feeling that, at least put on a good face, you know what I mean.

After all this running, I’m sad to report that my Philippines disease, had, at this point, after aviation, a bit of rushing about and everything else, really decided to peak. Yep, those Dubai meds were a waste of money, I was coughing rough and not feeling great at all. But, on a positive side, we were leaving Manchester Airport and heading home. It was a bit confusing how we’d pay, as they’ve not removed the machines, you, literally now just leave and are expected to pay on their website. Your vehicle is tracked by its registration and you do it that way. If it wasn’t for me noticing a sign with a link, it wouldn’t have been very clear on how you do. Plus, if you don’t pay it in 48 hours, you get quite a hefty fine. Thankfully, though, it was a fairly simple  Pay, and you’re done.

After a bit of conversations in the Car, enjoying some old school music too, amusingly, my Dad had decided to put some cushions in the back of the Car. No idea, why. But, apparently this was to make the journey home more comfortable for us to rest. Hannah, didn’t need extra, she was off quicker than a flick of a finger. Slept all the way home. Wild.

Then, before we knew it, we’re here

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We’re finally home!

I’ve come back home from the Philippines multiple times now, I’ve always felt a bit tired, but, never like this. And, also, I’ve never had to look at the time after settling in and go… OMG I’ve barely 5 hours to sleep, if I even can. Now, obviously, I really should be able to sleep, and, I probably would, it’s my bed, it’s where I’m used to, but this cough was just all over the place. Thankfully, I did get, a couple hours, but, what an awful time to get a full-on cough. My throat, wouldn’t get better until, honestly, the date I’m writing and finishing this post… that’s how long it took! I’m still not 100% now.

Some gifts, then, we find the Mangos!!!

It was so annoying arriving back home, you’ve a billion and one stories, especially on this trip with all the Drama with my journey there, and, even on the way back to some extent, to realise you’ve to get your ass to bed as soon as possible. I did what I could to fill it as much as I could, had a few laughs with my Parents, saw Larry who didn’t hate us, thankfully… well, me, anyway. He’s always hated Hannah, that’s just because she’s bad to him, though.

Then, we had a few Gift exchanges. Hannah had got my Parents some fridge magnets, key rings and stuff, and, I’d decided to get a 6-pack of Red Horse. I’d give my Parents a couple each, which, quickly became one each as they were not that keen on it. I had one myself, then, I ended up giving one to my Sisters Husband to finish. Stephen would be the lucky one to get the last two. Even he wasn’t impressed, really. It’s not awful Red Horse, it’s just, clearly, a Lager they’ve made to be strong, and not thought about anything else.

Then, it happened! We found out the real reason why Hannah’s luggage was 25kg. Was it the tins, was it the drinks, was it the million packs of Noodles. Well, they will contribute, but, ohhh no, it was much more! In fact, it wasn’t one…two… heck, five or ten, Hannah had brought 12 Mangos with her to the UK. Ohhh yeah, when she said “my Family is bringing the Mango”, she was bringing not one, but, one DOZEN!!! Each is 500grams, so, make no wonder she was 25kg. Cutting it short, really, when you think about it. We’d of had to do some emergency swapping if she was over. But, yeah that was rather amusing, to say the least!

Then, it was time to get to bed. The Mangos stored away, the bags remain. I knew tomorrow was going to be soooo hard, though. I ended up texting my Manager to, hopefully consider allowing me to work from home, but, got no reply. So, I was set to wake up at the awful hours 😩

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Saved, but … disappointing too late

It’s been a while since I’ve woke up in such a… dead feeling way. Yeah, I was not feeling too great. My cough, alongside being, generally, late, the previous night, meant I was running on nothing. Despite this, I got myself out of bed, and we were off.

On the bus, I was really struggling. Whilst Hannah was chilling in bed, I was trying to get myself to stay awake, then, it happened. I finally got a reply to my last night text, and was able to work from home. Frustratingly, though, I was already, like 40% there, but, believe me, it was soooo worth getting my ass home, instead. I’d a ton of things I needed to do, and, if I couldn’t this day, sleep opportunity, so much easier when at home.

Home to, happily, doing nothing…

I was really not feeling going into the office, so, getting that option to work at home, I was not going to let this pass. I literally, immediately, pushed the button, and got myself back home as soon as I possibly could. I was able to get home with, still a good half hour to spare from when I’d have to start. Although, what I’d be doing would be, kind of nice.

Yeahhh… we had nothing to do. For reasons I’ll get into in a future post, when we came back from a long time off, most of our work was being covered, and, we ended up in a very welcome situation where we had no work to do. This was very appreciated and convenient. Don’t get me wrong, if I came home when I should have done, I’d of had time to chill, and I’d of been in the office, then, ironically, might have been annoyed if there was nothing to do. So, depending on how you want to look at it, things worked out, in the end.

As mentioned, there will be a future post coming up in regards to quite a few big changes in work, and, otherwise, plus I've a new blog about things since coming home coming up too. This is, very much, just about the Philippines trip, and the 24 hours after getting back!

Having nothing to do, work wise, meant that I was able to get some unpacking done, as was Hannah and… I did have something waiting for me when I got home, too, which I’m very excited to do more write ups about, going forward, in the future…

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AYN Thor!

It wasn’t just getting home that was something to be excited about for me when I got home, I also had something waiting for me, the AYN Thor. You’ve, most likely, never heard of it, and are not sure what the hell this thing is. Looks like some makeshift Nintendo DS, which, coincidentally is one of its big selling points. But, that’s not all that this can do. But, since purchasing, it’s recently had a price hike due to the RAM-pocolipse, but, I’d argue, even after the slight price increase, this is still one of the best gaming devices you can get.

The device is cheaper to purchase direct from AYN, even though it is in dollars. UK warehouses do stock the device, but the equivalent device would cost £643, so clearly scalpers taking advantage, so, don’t. Prices, as of April 2026;

• Lite: 8GB RAM + 128GB Storage = $249
• Base: 8GB RAM + 128GB Storage = $319
• Pro: 12GB RAM + 256GB Storage = $399
• Max: 16GB RAM + 512GB Storage = $469
• Max: 16GB RAM + 1TB Storage = $549

Lite model has the Snapdragon 865. All other versions have the more powerful Snapdragon 8 Gen 2. For those wanting DS, or lower, the Lite will be done, but, for more, like Switch Games, the 8 Gen 2.

When I purchased the AYN Thor, it was before the RAM-pocolypse (caused by overuse of AI, give it a Google, causing price increases of almost everything), so was able to get a 1TB version for $469, which is about £340. So, begs the question what actually can you do with the AYN Thor. Well, with 2 amazing looking OLED touchscreens, yes, you can emulate Nintendo DS and 3DS, very well, but, you can also play so much more. Ironically, I’ve been playing more Nintendo Switch games, they run so good, especially with MrTurnip Drivers, T27, the latest, as of posting this. But first, let’s unbox it;

Once huge benefit of picking the Black model, you don’t get the black bars on the screens when running Games that are, either, legacy and run in 4:3, or, on the bottom screen when running, DS, 3DS, or even Wii-U games. But, the other colours are still fairly decent. But, as you can see below, I’ve really been mostly using it for Nintendo Switch. All games run, literally, as good as they did on the Nintendo Switch 1.

I love the gaming addition of LED backlights on the two circle controls. You can configure them to any colour you like, and, the setting you’re seeing there is the lowest brightness, they get very bright and look pretty good. I’ve settled for the Switch 2 colours for inspiration. One thing I will say, speaking of Switch 2, this thing will never compete with that, but, anything before, 100%.

But, it’s not just Nintendo Switch and lower, you can run Sony’s Playstation 1, 2, 3, PSP, Vita, Sega and so much more. There’s a very, early, Xbox Emulator, but, it needs work. The AYN Thor is running Android, meaning that you’ll be running a range of Emulators to run your favourite consoles. But, it’s not so much the Emulators that make the AYN Thor special, it’s the Frontend.

Out of the box, the AYN Thor doesn’t look as awesome as it’s shown above, this is thanks to Cocoon. There’s many options if you don’t want quite the trouble setting it up and playing around with it, but, it’s so worth it in the end. You can check out how to make it look the best with this video from fellow-brit Gaming channel Graves. I think the ergonomics of the device are perfect, but, if you don’t, there’s an option Grip you can use to make it slightly more comfortable.

The thing that blows me away about the AYN Thor is the performance, this runs everything I throw at it just incredibly. Yes, you can even run Steam Windows games using Proton and apps like Game Native. Performance with Windows games, obviously, are best not to be too optimistic. I’ve been, also, really enjoying playing the AYN Thor, not just through itself, but, the USB-C at the bottom also does video out, then, pair a Bluetooth controller, and you’ve the most portable Game console you could get. Who needs a Switch, I say.

Plus, if you don’t feel like you need the ultimate model, or, just not the Storage right now, or, if, like me, you got the 1TB version and may want a bit more, there’s also a microSD Card slot. Definitely get one with A2 or higher speed, otherwise, it’s probably not worth getting it for most games. Officially, it only supports up to a 1TB microSD Card, however, people have managed to get some 1.5GB and 2TB microSD Cards.

Cons: You need a bit of patience…

Pretty much everything is a pro with this thing, it’s just incredible. Yes, it’s disappointing about the price hikes recently, but, if this goes back to where I purchased it, it’s so worth it. But, not everything is perfect. I’d put negatives with the AYN Thor down to two things;

The Setup

As I mentioned, and, you’ll of noticed in that Graves video, getting the AYN Thor to look like a true Gaming device, does take a lot of work. There’s a number of Frontends like Beacon, IISU, Cocoon, and, even more, really. All of which have a very different interpretation and end result, but, as I said, yes it’s not great out of the box, but, once you set it up, it is worth it. But, it is stressful getting there. BUT, once it’s set up, even if you add more Games later, it’s easy after that point.

If you don’t care about a frontend, you can just use it as it is out of the box, an Android tablet with 2 screens. You can just launch games via the Emulator, or App, instead. So, it’s not end of the world.

The speakers

The only hardware that feels a bit weak on the AYN Thor, apart from the lack of any Cameras, are the Speakers. The OLED screens are amazing, top even runs 120Hz, the buttons feel incredibly premium, I’d argue some of the best D-Pad controls I’ve ever used, with LED lights, all in a premium glass and plastic feel. But, when it comes to the sound, things get a bit weak. Luckily, you’ve Bluetooth, USB display out, or a 3.5mm headphone jack to get around this, but, the Speakers are pretty bad.

There are a few Android “hacks”, if you like, to try and get around this. But, all of them don’t seem that different, enough, for the extra work and potential battery-drain to get them working. So, best keeping it as it is and just accepting it. If you’re playing Retro games, they’re perfectly fine, and even for Pokémon they’re decent enough, but, if you want to watch anything like YouTube, or streaming, you might be a bit let down.

Summary

I can’t recommend the AYN Thor enough, this is the end game handheld device to run any Game you like. For me, it’s the ultimate Pokémon machine. I can run everything from Red and Blue, all the way up to Legends ZA. But, obviously Switch 2 is a thing, so, no Pokopia or Winds and Waves. But, even so, you can also run anything else that is on any Emulator that can run on Android. For the best Emulator results, you’re best going on Github, rather than the Play Store.

For the price, right now, it’s probably not as big of a no brainer, to get, but, even so, for those that are looking for this, trust me, it’s worth it.

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More posts coming up later…

That’s as far as this blog is going to take you. I didn’t realise until I started writing about the Philippines trip, just how much there was to say. It didn’t help with the ongoing War going on creating quite a bit more of an… adventurous, let’s just say, travel. But, there’s a lot more still to come.

I’ve two posts coming later at the end of May, one to cover everything since retuning back from the Philippines, and, another to finally update you on a big step taken in my life. But, for now, there you go.